The Engineer and The Lactation Chic

everyday is something new

2012-02-06T21:38:00.000-05:00

Over the weekend, the Engineer found LE like this in the morning. And, of course, now this is how we find her after every sleep. She's such a determined little girl.

We are now getting little waves, claps, and growls. But standing is her favorite trick, by far. She's the pokiest crawler...it's about the journey for her. She takes a few slow-mo crawls and then stops to check out something, you know, like a piece of fuzz. I thought I'd be chasing her down once she started crawling, but not my journey loving, under momma's feet girl.

Jammies are definitely my favorite thing to have her in. Don't you just want to give her a big snuggle?

germs probably breed on babies

2012-02-05T20:21:00.001-05:00

You spend all this time preparing for the birth and first few days of your child's life, but there are so many other firsts that no one prepares you for.
This week it was explosive poo and vomit. It was a Rent-A-Rug-Doctor kinda week. It was every where. I was alone and after the 7th vomit I finally broke down and begged the Engineer to come home from class early. Up until this point I wasn't really sure what LE's signs for "Mama, I'm going to get sick, act quick" were. Now I know. And I also know to put a towel on myself, keep a bucket near by, and stay in one place. When the Engineer walked into our mini war zone he asked "Did you purposely let her get sick all over the house?" And it kinda did look like that.

Just to make the weekend extra special, the Engineer and I got LE's cooties. I still haven't figured out how to take care of baby while being sick...except lots of cartoons. I have a feeling this is only the start of family sickness, especially considering how often the girl gets sick while still being breastfed. I don't even want to think of what is going to happen when she weans.

Feeling better!

babyled weaning: learning to drink

2012-01-26T20:07:00.000-05:00

I've been feeling a little defeated on the sippy cup front.

(I know it sounds like a really terrible problem.)

I've let LE play with sippy cups for a few months, but they all have the most ridiculous anti-spill mechanisms. One she needs to bite the spout and then suck - not a trick that a nursing mother wants her child with 3 teeth to learn! Another has a straw and you have to suck with all your might to get anything out. I'm sure there are better options out there, but these are the two we have.

I saw a mommy friend offering her nalgene bottle with a flexible straw inside to her toddler and thought that was a pretty brilliant, yet simple idea. She said you can teach baby's to suck by starting with a smoothie via straw - this gives them incentive to learn how to make the straw work. So, today I made LE a basic smoothie (plain whole milk yogurt with some frozen strawberries and peaches) and SHE LEARNED TO USE A STRAW instantly! I was so proud of my baby.

(I promise she doesn't wear this dress everyday...it just keeps making it in photos.)

camera (and people) shy

2012-01-25T20:42:00.000-05:00

LE loses all her silliness and becomes the most serious baby when we actually try to take a family photo.

Normally she spends all day blowing bubbles and hamming it up. Unless I try to leave her with someone...then she screams. Even a strange person saying "hello" can put her into tears these days. I take her to my gym's daycare a couple times a week. Some days I make it through 30 minutes of yoga or swimming before they come to get me, some days it's only 3 minutes, and on a really lucky day I make it the full hour. All the workers know her by name now and they are probably wondering why I keep bringing the poor child back. She's my sensitive soul little girl. And I guess she's on to my trying to pawn her off...

Want a cute baby for a couple of hours? Call me. (Seriously.)

gettin' her hair did

2012-01-19T18:07:00.000-05:00

We have been super blessed that pretty much all of LE's wardrobe has been donated or gifted to us. A couple of our dear neighbors have really pitched in, as their daughters are exactly one year older than LE making their hand-me-downs perfect for us. I literally have only bought her a few things, and even then it's from the clearance rack.

One item we have been given are hair bows. While I think my neighbor's daughter and other little girls look adorable in bows and headbands with flowers, I just don't think my LE is one of them. She's the prettiest (and smartest, because lets face it, LE's got the whole package) little girl I have ever seen, but she's got more of a tomboy look (is that possible for a baby?) or maybe I'm just not a bow mom...

You judge...

I was a pigtail girl myself. The Engineer told me after a few years of dating that I looked ridiculous and was too old for pigtails. It was one of those "that would have been nice to know 3 years ago" moments. I was in grad school at that point, in his defence. I remember it clearly, because it had never hit me before that I was probably too old for pigtails. We were helping his brother and SIL move into their new home. I was also wearing a little boys t-shirt from salvation army...probably was too old for that move too, right Engineer?

pumped up kicks

2012-01-18T10:01:00.000-05:00

(I'm super proud of those thighs. I made them, and am continuing to make them so glorious!)

So, as LE starts to stand up and "cruise" a little, my mom mentioned I needed to get her some STRIDE RITE White Shoes.

Like these...

via

You know, so she doesn't roll her ankles?!

I informed my mother that those were so 30 years ago and shoes are no longer recommended, especially before they are walking and even then barefoot is better. So they say.

We then went to the mall and happened to come across a Stride Rite store and sure enough they had a pair of white high tops for sale. Oh dear, LE would be the nerdiest baby alive in those. But they did have some cool socks that have elastics around the ankles, keeping those puppies in place - Genius! Aren't socks one of your biggest baby battles? It's certainly mine. I usually let LE win if we're inside. Honestly, I don't pick a ton of battles to win. I win the "you must sit buckled in your carseat" and "you must wear a diaper" battle and that's about it.

welcome to my world of cloth

2012-01-13T14:12:00.000-05:00

Once you go cloth, you'll probably never go back. It's a whole world that I never knew existed, and once I was introduced I became completely sucked in.

(I have to thank my dear friend, Katie, for inspiring me to go cloth.)

So, if cloth diapering isn't for you, trust me I understand, but if you're interested or have thought to yourself "My oh my, LE's booty is super cute in those colorful dipes!" then this post is for you.

We started with an All In One (AIO) diaper. This means the diaper is exactly like a disposable, no stuffing, no pinning, no covers. We used Bum Genius XS AIO diapers for LE's first two months of life. It fit well around her newborn umbilical cord, was easy for our families to use, fit LE's tiny newborn frog butt, and had a fleece layer to wick the moisture away from LE's delicate newborn skin. I loved the ease of use, but we had lots of leaks with this diaper.

My little peanut LE in her Bum Genius AIO dipes. Really does it get much cuter than this?!

Around a month or two we started to add Kissaluvs Fitted Diaper, Size 0, with a Cover into our routine. This is a diaper that snaps on and then has a cover that velcros on to keep everything waterproof. We had less leaks with this system, but what I didn't like was: it was two steps, bulky, and held the wetness against LE's skin.

A Kissaluv with cover.

Around three months we started to use a One Size Pocket Diaper....and dun dun life was wonderful! This style of diaper is similar to a disposable, but it has a pocket that you stuff with inserts that act as "soakers". This allows you to use more inserts at night or during nap time when the baby may wet more. This style of diaper also has the fleece layer that wicks moisture away from baby's skin, keeping that little bum nice and dry. We have two styles of One Size Pockets, both have snaps in the front. My favorite is our Fuzzibunz brand. This brand has adjustable elastic in the legs that allows you to size the diaper for a snugger fit. We have had significantly less leaks since using Fuzzibunz and virtually no blowouts, which is pretty amazing as we all know how explosive those breastmilk poos can be! The other brand we have is Babylands. This diaper does the trick, but it doesn't fit as snugly and tends to leak more frequently. However, it's 1/4 of the price...so, if you're not up for investing too much money it diapers, this is a good option. A one size diaper should last through potty training.

In a Babyland dipe.

Fuzzibunz make everyone happy!

My stash:

22 XS Bum Genius AIO Diapers (Half of these were gently used from a trial diaper website, half new), approx $12/each new and $10/each used
12 Size 0 Kissaluvs Fitted Diapers (All gently used, from a trial diaper website) $7/each used
5 XS-Small Covers, various brands (All used, from a Craigslist mom) $40 for 5 covers
16 One Size Fuzzibunz (New from baby showers and a variety of websites, I waited for deals to come up) Normally $20/each, but I got them for $12-14/each via different online specials.
5 One Size Babylands $25 for 5 new diapers on Ebay.

(I have to say that if we have another little peanut baby next time, I may use disposables for the first month or two and go straight to the one size pocket diapers.)

Cloth doesn't end with diapers themselves...You need pail liners, wetbags, and special detergents.

My extras:

Size Medium Planetwise Wetbag and a no-brand, handmade Wetbag (for on the go diaper changes, store the dirty diaper and then wash both diaper and bag) - both work wonderfully, keeping the stink and wetness tucked away in my diaper bag.
2 Kissaluvs Pail liners
I use Tide Free and Clear and Charlie's Soap (or Trader Joes brand), switching between the two every other wash. I figure it helps to switch between to help with soap build up...but I have no science behind this decision.
Biokleen Bac Out, to help keep the stinkiness down. I pour a splash in my first cold wash. Before using this, LE's diapers would have a funky fishy smell to them...ewww. Bac Out is amazing for cleaning all sorts of things and it's natural/non-toxic!
Vinegar, a couple splashes in the rinse cycle. I use a Downy Ball, because we don't have a fabric softener section in our washer.
Baking Soda, just a sprinkle or two in the pail liners to help keep things smelling fresh in between washes.
Since starting solids, I have incorporated a flushable diaper liner into our routine. You can get a roll of 200 for $10. Some people use sprayers that connect to the toilet or a spatula, but I like how easy it is to just flush the mess away.

Washing....There's lots of opinions out there, but here's my routine:

Cold wash, no detergent, but a splash of Bac Out.
Hot wash, detergent, and vinegar in rinse.
Dry on low heat.

If you're local to the DC area there's a great store called Abby's Lane where you can check out all your diaper options. They also have free shipping and, in my experience, great customer service. This is a lot of info, but as I said, cloth is a whole world and I've only touched the tip of the iceberg here. Hope this is helpful for any of you interested in going cloth - you won't regret it!

how does yogurt fit into babyled weaning?

2012-01-06T18:16:00.000-05:00

One word: Messy.

Organic plain, whole milk yogurt mixed with mashed blueberries and strawberries. LE says yum. Of course that's what she says to every food, but this one looks a little extra "yum" to her. Other foods LE is enjoying: pizza, beef stew, greek salad, tacos, and basically you name she eats it. If you can get past the mess, baby led weaning is pretty fun.

bring on the boring

2012-01-05T12:54:00.000-05:00

As we ring in the New Year, I've decided 2012 is going to be our year of stability. A good year, but maybe a little on the low key side. Last year held my greatest highs and lows in life and a boring year would be welcomed with open arms.

On a different note, as I was signing the new date 01/03/12, I told the Engineer "Wow 2012...I remember when we partyed like it was 1999, because it was 1999." To which he'd said "You didn't seriously just say that." Do you remember...y2k? My friends and I always had ridiculously lame, but fun, parties. It was always a slumber party full of sparkling grape juice, noise makers, dancing, and dress up.

Happy New Year! I wish you all an exciting, or maybe rather boring, year.

See my baby belly. Don't you want to come over and blow a raspberry?!

ash cave

2011-12-30T11:40:00.000-05:00

We took LE to Ash Cave, our marriage site, the other day for the first time. She got to see a wedding while we were there. I'm not sure who has an outdoor wedding in December, but it was cool that we got to watch one on LE's first visit.

It brings back good memories to walk through Ash Cave again. We talked about how some people like to renew their vows, but we have no desire too. Nothing could top that day. And now here we are 3 years and some change with a little engineer. I must say that 6 months has been the best yet! She's becoming more and more fun each day, laughing more than crying (Thank God!, literally.), and becoming comfortable in her little world. Those first couple of months are just WOW! And not really a good wow, but a holy crap kinda wow. I have to say it again, I know I've said it before, but it just keeps getting better. And look at that little face, it's just too kissable. We hope to have many more trips to our ole tying the knot spot with LE and all our babies to come. I hope they love it as much as we do!

why we are, obviously, no longer in a rush...

2011-12-28T20:12:00.000-05:00

In DC everyone seems to be in a hurry. A train to catch, traffic to fight, some place to be. This is one reason I love being a stay at home mom. I have no where to be, no deadlines to meet, no place to rush to. LE and I just take our good ole time getting places and doing things. My only timeline is to change a diaper and breastfeed every couple of hours. Whatever else happens is just extras.

Normally a flight wouldn't be noteworthy. We already know LE is an awesome flier. But today was different. We got to the airport an hour and a half early. Got to our gate, had an overpriced Starbucks coffee, and set LE down on the dirty airport floor to play while we played with our new Ipad. Our gate was packed, so we sat at a nearby gate. All of sudden things started to look empty and we realized it was past time for our flight.

Yep, we sat there through all the announcements, including our own names being called several times, and missed our stinkin flight. Apparently we were just out of earshot of the speakers and I guess we were just in our own world, watching LE be cute, recapping on our week away, people watching...who knows. So, then we got to hang out at the airport for an extra two and a half hours and try to justify to each other why we really weren't idiots.

Enjoying a pickle. I was surprised she liked it so much!

bah-hum-bug

2011-12-27T11:42:00.001-05:00

The Engineer and I were scrooges this year. We didn't decorate or buy ourselves (including LE) presents. Lucky for LE, she has un-scrooge-like grandparents who made up for our lack of spirit.

Christmas morning

We had this brilliant idea when we first got married that all glass ornaments were the classy way to do Christmas. And I didn't really feel like fighting a newly crawling baby on the matter of "Don't touch the highly breakable tree." Next year we'll get our act together.

Playing with her new toys (yes, that is an abacus in the background) and sporting her homemade hippie Christmas skirt.

a baby letter

2011-12-22T19:30:00.000-05:00

I smile real big now. I'm starting to crawl, sit by myself, and pull myself up. Mommy is a little concerned that she's going to have to start working harder now, but I think it's funny. I love my toys and when daddy comes home from work...I hate diaper changes and getting my nose wiped. I figured I should write you all and show you my cute face since my mommy is such a slacker these days.

Love,

my breast friends

2011-12-13T20:46:00.001-05:00

Ok, so this is going to sound lame, but I haven't been posting much lately because I lost my CAMERA BATTERY CHARGER...

And what's a post without some cute baby photos to go with it?

I basically have nothing without LE's cute face on here. It's probably the only reason you read. Be honest! And before LE it was my super cute belly with her inside it. And before that it was self photos of my handsome husband and me on all our fun trips. My poor Engineer he rarely makes my blog these days...

Today LE went to her first Christmas party. A colleague/mentor, Nancy, had a wonderful baby momma party complete with her as Mrs. Claus (too cute!) and Paula Dean french toast (yum!). The best part about becoming a lactation consultant in the DC area has been the amazing mentors. I'm so grateful to the women who have taken me under their wing and taught me all about the mighty "boob". They are the women who forged the way and brought the field into existence, and I'm one lucky girl to get to stand beside them.

A big thank you to Vergie, Margaret, Nancy and Maire (to just name a few :-)!

And then (to continue down this sappy path) a slew of young lactation consultants have joined me in this career and many of them have become my greatest friends. We've entered the field together, had babies together, and dreamed of how we can shake up the breastfeeding world together.

It's the kind of field where women bond together and invest in each other, because we're all working towards the same goal. We're all excited about the leaps and bonds made and we celebrate each step together.

Don't you wish you were a LC? Well hey, why not join us?!

a skinny jeans kind of day

2011-12-09T19:45:00.000-05:00

Today the heavens opened and I heard a

"Hallelujah!!"

Because, you see, I was getting ready to meet my friend, Joanna, and baby Vivian at the mall today and I realized I had nothing but dirty jeans. (And in our household this means you've worn them a few times before you threw them in the dirty laundry basket...and with LE's spit up, even one re-wear is really pushing it.) So, I thought well maybe just for the heck of it I'll try on my old skinny jeans that used to fit me like a glove pre-pregnancy. You know the kind of jeans you sort of have to wiggle into and out of at the end of the day. What do you know...They may be provocatively tight, but they fit! So, I wore those puppies with pride today.

And because I can tell you the above story, I am feeling confident enough to tell you the following story...

I was out in Rosslyn yesterday, the Engineer and I's old stomping grounds and I was stopped by the Cosi clerk with this question, after ordering my pollo y pasta soup, "Excuse me ma'am, are you pregnant or is your baby already here?"

**This photo is a couple of months old, but it gives you an idea of what I look like with LE in my sweater cocoon.

I looked down at my sweet LE snoozing in her pouch, aka the ergo baby carrier, and looked back at this lady with my best "are you serious" look, because clearly there was a baby head right there on my chest. I opened up my sweater which encompassed both LE and I and showed the lady her legs dangling down my side to assure her "Yes, my baby is indeed here, but thank you for asking, crazy lady."

People say the darnedest stuff when you have a baby.

6 months

2011-12-05T10:27:00.001-05:00

Last week my LE turned 6 months. Can you believe half of a year already?! She's growing so much every day. This week her first little tooth popped through. And I wasn't sure whether to celebrate or mourn, because you just really never know what these new steps will do to sleep and really isn't it all about sleep? As soon as we're getting a good nights sleep we pray nothing will change! But she's taking the new tooth thing like a champ, other than gnawing on her daddy and me all the time.

Liking french toast and banana sticks.

(Baby food modification: Make one slice of french toast pre-cinnamon batter for baby. Bananas easily split into thirds, making perfect finger sized food for baby.)

Food suddenly became more interesting this week. The Pediatrician told me no wheat, protein, or milk yet, but oops I had already given her them all (note: we have no history of food allergies).

Lately, I'm becoming a huge fan of MATERNAL INSTINCT. Seriously, where did all the maternal instinct go in our culture? Have we lost it in some dark corner in the basement of society? I think we should pull it back out, dust it off, and put it on the living room mantel, where we live our everyday lives. For example, I don't need a medical doctor to tell me how to feed my baby, when to nurse, how to put her to sleep or comfort her. I'm actually sick of professionals telling me I need to let her "cry it out," nurse less frequently, give her mushy Gerber cereals, etc. I need a medical doctor to tell me if my baby's lungs, heart, and other body parts look ok, the other stuff I can figure out.

That's the nice thing about a home birth. If I can catch my own baby (with the assistance of a nurse midwife), I probably can figure out the rest. So, trust that inner voice! You know you're baby best, and you know what works for you and your family.

Sweetly sleeping, my favorite.

so you say you're from ohio?

2011-11-21T11:31:00.001-05:00

Ok, this might sound bad, but I prefer midwesterners. They are my favorite kind of people. Whenever I meet a midwesterner I automatically assume we should be friends, because of course they are going to live life at a slower pace, want kids, and be generally friendly and good-hearted.

Here's how I rank the country:
#1 Mid-westerners, followed by
#2 Non-East or West coasters

That's it. Now you know where you stand in my world...

The city can be quite rude and taint one over time. And I've been here almost 7 years! I'm worried the East coast has corrupted me and I may not fit in when I return to the Midwest...someday, over the rainbow. I might hate the slow walking and talking. The Engineer might feel lost with out a traffic jam to get stuck in. And LE might be scared of corn fields and cows.

Nah...I'm sure we'll fit in just peachy, someday.

all in an afternoons work

2011-11-17T19:57:00.001-05:00

The Engineer: What did you and LE do today?
Me: We went to Trader Joes, didn't make it inside though.
The Engineer: Sounds like fun.

This is a conversation I have far to frequently with my husband. What is it about Trader Joes that I can only make it into the store about half the time. I kid you not, I've been there twice this week, but haven't made inside yet.

Both times I was in the neighborhood, so it wasn't a complete waste, but still. The first time I realized I didn't have my wallet on me. LE was hungry, so I nursed her and then she slept on me for 20 minutes. The second time LE had fallen asleep in the car and I waited about 10 minutes and decided I didn't want to wait any longer, but I also didn't want to wake her, so I just left. I pondered if Trader Joes might be interested in paying me some money to fetch carts while I waste away part of my afternoon in their parking lot. Then I wondered if I was creeping the people out parked next to me, who see me sitting there when they go in the store and still there when they come out. I want to point to my back seat and indicate sleeping baby...not a creepy lady sitting in a "way too big for the city, gas guzzling" black SUV.

I'm hopeful tomorrow we'll make it inside. I know some people probably find my little "problem" to be ridiculous. I agree, it is. But don't you wish your problems were this simple and they came with a face this cute?

LE's newest trick - on her hands and knees rocking. Isn't it too soon...?

A closer look at my favorite rolls. 80% of all my pride is located in these thighs and booty. You understand, though, don't you?

confessions of this slacker mom

2011-11-16T20:10:00.001-05:00

(I know this is an odd title after I post about being a "perfectionist.")
But here I am, sitting on the red couch and eating a brownie ice cream sundae, while LE naps. Oh, and it's 9:30am.

I've been reading a book called "Confessions of a Slacker Mom." It's about letting kids experience the natural consequences of their actions, not buying lots of gadgety toys, etc. The whole premise is that being a slacker (or in better terms, more laid back) mom teaches kids more life lessons. Therefore, justifying one to be more lazy and cheap. Right up my alley.

Anyway, a month of so ago I was at the mall with Sarah feeding LE in the "mother's room" at Nordstrom (very awesome of you, btw, Nordstrom!) and I heard a little explosion happen in LE's diaper, followed by a couple more explosions. At this point all the moms are snickering and congratulating LE on her accomplishment (Don't we all celebrate a poop?). Sarah and I look at each other, because, you see, I decided to keep it simple and bring NOTHING with us. Luckily one of the moms took pity on me and gave me one of her toddler's diapers and some wipes. I put the 2 sizes too big diaper on LE and was left with one messy cloth diaper. Leaving me to have to ask a Nordstrom clerk for a shopping bag to place my poopy diaper in and carry it around a store way too posh for my stay at home mom life. I felt a little like a slacker mom, but I also felt inspired how moms stick together. Having a baby is an immediate entrance into a secret world of motherhood, where you help a momma out and take help when you need it!

practice doesn't make perfect

2011-11-10T15:19:00.000-05:00

I've been told I'm a perfectionist by both a psychiatrist and a counselor now, so I guess it must be true. I thought perfectionists lined everything up neatly in their cupboards and ironed their underwear, but apparently I'm one of the non-clean freak type of perfectionists.

(At the risk of sounding like, as my brother tells me, a desperate suburban housewife that pops pills, I'm going to tell you about my "therapy". Please don't judge, readers or brother.)
When the whole PPD thing hit I saw a psychiatrist, but she was expensive (Like the kind of expensive where you say to yourself "I totally picked the wrong career...") and the focus was mostly on medication, so I've since switched to my primary care physician for medication management and a licensed social worker for counselling. I feel like this combo is more productive, for me at least.

I wasn't sure counseling would be terribly helpful, because I feel like I talk about things pretty thoroughly, but it does seem to be helping to have an outsiders viewpoint and someone challenging me on the true source of my anxiety. Apparently, I have high expectations for parenting LE with a splash of "fear of failure." You probably asking what mother doesn't have this? It's this very combo of high expectations of self and fear of failure that has probably caused me anxiety throughout life, with my first memory of anxiety beginning in the fourth grade. I also hate change. Didn't need a credentialed person to tell me that one. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

I decided the counselor was probably right. You see, for example, I don't want LE to watch to tv...EVER. I think it's a bad habit and I decided the tv should never be on in her waking presence. Causing a source of tension between the Engineer and I, since there's football, espn, news, etc at the top of his list of things to do on Saturdays. I've pretty much completely gave up all tv, even my trashy tv favorites. No more Kardashians, Sister Wives, Kelly and Regis... Once she pointed this perfectionist tendency out in me, I realized I was being a bit extreme. A little tv isn't going to hurt LE. Our family isn't going to become couch potatoes if the Engineer watches one game on Saturdays. Time to let go, Julie, time to let go. Every parent messes up, but I'm still going to be a pretty great parent, and more likely an even better one if I let go of some of my expectations and perfectionism. I don't need to be perfect, just overall great will do.

Can one overcome anxiety? Especially if it goes all the way back to the fourth grade? Who knows. But I figure it can only get better if I try.

Now for your baby fix...

New favorite pastime: Knocking down towers.

what i didn't know

2011-11-08T19:28:00.000-05:00

about becoming a mother...

My perfume bottles would have an inch of dust on them and my new scent would be sour milk. I even bath in curds of spit up half the time when I take a bath with LE (which we both love doing, the bath, not the spit up).
I would learn to pee while nursing a newborn...and on one occasion go #2 (I know, gross, but true).
I'd say the phrase "Um, babe, I think I just peed all over the floor." (Ok, that's more the aftermath of childbirth, but still...).
My life would feel like the movie "Groundhog Day," except less suicidal.
Going to work or the gym would become a huge treat. And even if I'm only gone for an hour, I'd miss my baby.
I'd be so overwhelmed with exhaustion and love.
My romanticized ideas of a sleepy newborn would be crushed, and the Engineer and I would have to be "sleep enforcers," spending hours trying to get LE to sleep in her early weeks.
My new morning duties would include fishing out dried boogers from LE's crib.
When talking to the Pediatrician, I'd need to refine the art of nodding my head in agreeance and exclude certain bits of information...such as "My daughter sleeps on her tummy." Yikes!
"Poop" would become my #1 topic of conversation.
The Engineer wouldn't be allowed to LOOK at me unless there were at least two boxes of birth control in our house.
The Engineer and I would freak out on anyone who interrupts LE's sleep, be it an angry driver honking their horn in traffic or a teenager bumping into her stroller at the mall. Serioulsy people...can't you see the sleeping baby?!

Welcome to parenthood. It seems to bring out the worst and best in a person, and humble you in a way you never knew possible.

baby led weaning

2011-11-04T11:03:00.001-04:00

LE is the most adorable baby ever, but you already knew that... Sometimes she does rather funny things. Like her blank stare face with her mouth open. I'm sure it's her curious trying to figure out the world face. Or her excited kick legs and thrash arms up and down, hitting her self in the crouch repeatedly. The Engineer always says "Why does she keep hitting herself in the junk?"

There it is...the famous open mouth, stare.

Ok mommy, Twinkle, twinkle is my favorite song...I guess I'll smile for you.

Mixing it up, classic stare with a drip of spit up.

Oh how I love your face. Those cheeks are irrestible.

We haven't exactly "started solids", but I did start to give LE chuncks food to knaw on. She's been showing more interest in food in the last couple of weeks, so I figured we'd start experimenting. Her favorite is apple slices. I've decided to use a method called "Baby Led Weaning." (Here's a good resource.) Which essentially is skipping cereals and purees, giving baby chunks of food, and allowing them to feed themselves. YES, it's going to be REALLY messy, which is why most choose to do purees and spoon feeding. Right now I'm just letting her practice picking up foods and getting a taste for different flavors. I think we'll try chunks of avocado this weekend. With Baby Led Weaning your baby may or may not end up with any food in their mouth, but she gets a chance to explore food and decide when she's ready to eat solids. Over time she'll take more and more food and les and less breastmilk until she decides to wean. Sounds nice, right? We'll see how it goes...

Which brings up a question that I'm asked frequently:

"How long do you plan to breastfeed?"

And to be honest I don't have a great answer. Atleast a year, maybe two. I secretely hope LE gently weans herself sometime during the 12-24 month period. I haven't thought about what I'll do if she wants to go longer than 2 years. Right now, I love breastfeeding and am in no hurry to wean, but by two years I'll probably be singing a different tune.

Happy weekend to everyone! Hope it's relaxing (that's our goal).

boo

2011-10-31T09:38:00.000-04:00

LE was a big, scary (ok, super cute, cherry on top, drooling) cupcake at her baby Halloween party yesterday.

Watch out or I'll get you with my big sloppy kisses!

(Thanks for the costume, Auntie Sarah!)

These days our latest activities end by 5:30pm, and the only parties we get invitations to are from 1 year olds. Who knew having a 5 month old would equal such a booming social calendar...from birthdays, to holiday parties, to baby happy hours. Oh and my favorite yet, the Engineer taking LE to Chucky Cheese.

LE, you have managed to turn your lazy, introverted folks into some bizarre form of socialites! Just the other day I had a pregnant mom approach me because she heard I organize a mom group. The Engineer and I just looked at each wondering how I became the go to mom in our complex? I mean literally we lived here for 2 years pre-LE and not ONE single person ever talked to us. I guess we were meant to do this baby thing...and, therefore, we'll have to have more. But not for a really, really long time! Just in case you were wondering, we are on a Engineer finish school before we can even say the word "baby making" timeline.

Forget "boo", "baby making" is way more scary this Halloween!

the week

2011-10-29T12:08:00.001-04:00

It's been a White House and poop in the tub kind of week.

LE and I ventured downtown with another mommy friend and baby. We had fun showing our little ones the sights and really just getting out of the house. Then the Engineer and I were invited to do a tour of the West Wing. It was scheduled for after LE's bedtime, so I almost skipped out, but at the last minute I decided to be brave and leave my sweetie pie for our first evening "date". Being a stay at home mom is awesome, but it makes it hard to ever get away. I love LE to pieces, but sometimes I miss how carefree and lazy the Engineer and I used to be. We'll have it back in a decade or two and then we'll probably miss the chaos of our kiddos.

On a less significant note, LE pooped in the tub twice this week. There's always those moments when she makes her strained pooped face in the tub and I think "Oh crap don't do it." And she never did, until this week. Apparently the relaxing warm water gets things a moving.

Isn't she looking so big? My little baby is growing up. Well not too much, I guess, since she poops in the tub!

one fell off and bumped her head

2011-10-24T20:01:00.000-04:00

I'm feeling like a bad momma today. While watching my neighbors son, I proped LE up in the corner of the couch and a few minutes later I heard a thud followed by screaming. I remember my mom telling me every baby eventually falls off a couch or a bed. But I thought, why would that happen? Once LE is rolling I'll just make sure I put her in safe places. And even though I knew it wasn't smart, I left her in the corner of the couch for just ONE minute. Turns out I'm just like everyone else, I'm no super mom...

Becoming a parent certainly helps you extend grace to your own parents. Before being a parent you talk about all the ways you'll do it differently and after becoming a parent you realize your parents were trying really hard, but they too were human.

I also set off the fire alarm making pot roast and paid several hundred too much for new tires today. My Engineer, being the kind soul he is, told me "It's just a Monday." He also said he was glad LE fell off the couch on my watch that way he won't feel so bad when it happens to him. I appreciate his grace for all my Monday mishaps.

In good news, the weekend went well, so I'm feeling more confident about travel again. Here's some pics of trip:

LE is such a great air traveler.

A big fan of the window seat!

Papaw has the magic touch for putting LE to sleep.

Lovin on grammy.

Our family sans brother.

a little too ironic, yeah, i really do think

2011-10-19T08:59:00.000-04:00

So, I told EVERYONE that we were on a traveling hiatus this month. And we especially were not going to go to OHIO. The thought of traveling causes me anxiety. It was traveling that kicked off this whole "LE not sleeping" thing; and therefore, traveling is no longer my friend.

And then life said, "Hey you, get over yourself. You're going to Ohio!"

Looks like we're going to Ohio for my grandmother's funeral. Fingers crossed it'll be a good thing. It's making the Engineer take some time off of work and will hopefully be a nice get-a-way, family bonding sort of trip.

On a side note, LE has actually slept through the night a couple of times! She'll throw us a bone and then go back to her old ways of waking up every a hour or two. Please, what is the magic combination, dear child of mine?! But, nonetheless, there's light at the end of the tunnel. And again, the baby minimalist me is being a huge hypocrite and doing everything possible to replicate LE's sleep arrangements in Ohio. Money I will spend and stuff I will collect, if it gives me any hope of LE sleeping well.

Oh the irony.

my grandma

2011-10-17T13:26:00.000-04:00

You know what the best thing about a grandma is...they say the darnedest things. Just like a little child, they say exactly what pops into their head. No beating around the bush, just the honest truth. (remember this post?)

When the Engineer met my grandma she was in the ER on a bed (took a fall off some steps on her way to our house). She looked at him and said in a very matter of fact tone "I thought you'd be taller." The next time she saw him (she was home and sitting up) she told him "You've grown! You're very handsome." Perspective, I guess, changes things for both a grandmother and a child.

I love how simply my grandmother thought. She truly had a childlike faith. I remember her telling me that Jesus didn't actually drink wine, it was really just grape juice. I just agreed with her...what would be the point in discussing cultural contexts and historical facts? She also had an amazing ability to forgive others and love in spite of their sins. I'm always setting boundaries and protecting myself and family from being hurt, and even though I think my choices are mostly healthy, I admired my grandmother's ability to let go and love.

Last night she met her creator. And I know without a doubt that she was filled with a childlike excitement when she saw Him.

Betty Coleman

04/27/1934- 10/16/2011

ppd revisited

2011-10-14T18:02:00.000-04:00

So before we get into the depressing stuff (yes, I mean that literally), lets have an "awwwww, she's so cute" moment...

(Thanks for making LE a personalized onesie, Angela!)

I don't really want to dwell too much on the topic, but I figured an update was in order. Last week was a bit rough in our house. LE is acting a bit like a newborn at night for the last several weeks and it finally caught up with me. I started to feel my post partum depression symptoms return. It starts with anxiety, moves into insomnia, and depression follows. Luckily I was able to acknowledge it and work towards moving on, again. It's two steps forward and one back, right? For the most part when I have a bad day or week I know that I just need to push through it and things will pass in a few days. Last week a sleep aid help me get back on track.

It seems that the question people ask me most in person is if I had to take any medication to help with my PPD. And the answer is YES. I've never taken an anti-depressant before, but I also never had to take care of a baby 24/7 before. When my PPD hit I felt like I couldn't just press through it on my own, because I needed to be happy for LE and to be able to take great care of her. So, when the doctor suggested an antidepressant my first thought was "Will this effect my breastmilk?" and once I was reassured it was safe I decided it was the right move for me at that time. Although, it hasn't been medication alone that has helped me...as you've noticed through my blog posts.

The thing about entering into motherhood is that life is no longer just about you. Even when I married the Engineer life was still essentially about me. I could nap when I wanted to nap, eat when I wanted, sleep in, take my good ole time getting ready for the day; sure there's the money thing and learning to live with someone else, but for the most part we were both pretty self centered. Now everything is pretty much on LE's terms. I have lost complete control over sleep. I sleep when she does and wake when she does. And it's that loss of control that threw me off the most and caused me so much anxiety. I'm learning to let go and appreciate the lessons God is teaching me on becoming less self centered and more patient.

What I have found most helpful recently is praying while I'm putting LE to sleep (which can be a long process). If I pray for her and the Engineer, it tends to melt any frustrations I have towards them and helps me to be a more loving mother and wife. This has also made my toughest time of the day a more enjoyable time, a time for reflection.

There you have it. Everyday is not always pretty, but 'big picture' life's looking much better. If you're a fellow PPD momma, it can be tough and scary, but hang in there and get the help you deserve!

stuff, it's everywhere

2011-10-09T19:32:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time we were baby minimalists...

And then stuff happened. One borrowed item, one gift, nothing purchased, but some how everything has been gathered in what seems like every corner of the shoebox. (and a very big sincere thank you to the family and friends who have given/loaned all these items to us). The Engineer told me the other day as he carried the exersaucer into our home, that the pre-baby Julie would hate the current baby-clutter-Julie. True, but reality has hit and trying to keep a baby happy and entertained all day leaves me stuck with...well stuff, because it turns out it's a harder job than I ever realized.

that's how we do dessert

2011-10-08T19:39:00.000-04:00

Last weekend when Auntie Sarah was here...

And we made and ate this beast of a dessert...

It includes a brownie base, followed by a layers of peanut butter, milk chocolate, peanuts, vanilla ice cream, more peanut butter, nuts, and chocolate, and finally whip topping with a cherry on top!

I encourage you to treat yourself to one of these. Or better yet, come visit me and I'll treat you to one!

3 years and 1 baby later

2011-10-04T15:02:00.000-04:00

Happy Anniversary to my favorite guy!

The Engineer and I were married in Ohio at a State Park called "Ash Cave". It's one of my favorite places to go hiking. I'm looking forward to taking LE there for a visit someday soon. We had a small wedding with our closest family and friends. It was simple and perfect, all in one.

It's fun to reminisce about your favorite memories. My wedding day and LE's birth are at the top of my list, followed by our trips to Rockport, MA, the Mediterranean, and our honeymoon in Mexico. We keep a goal book to track what our dreams and hopes are and then record them as they come true. Traveling has a significant section in this book. Since many of our fondest memories have been on trips we hope to take LE (and future children) on lots of fun adventures. LE is was one of our dreams in our book and I'm so thankful she came true. When a goal/dream comes true we write that in there as well. It helps look back and see how good God has been to us.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."
-Psalm 37:4

Well, since I can't hang out with you today (stupid grad school), I guess a blog post to you will have to do!

I love you, Engineer!

baby's first cold

2011-09-30T10:30:00.000-04:00

AAAaaaachooo.

We've been having one of those kind of weeks. And I'm a sleepless momma, who can't seem to think of anything entertaining to tell you all. Auntie Sarah is coming to visit us this weekend, so hopefully that will help us pass some smiles your way soon!

flippin'

2011-09-19T17:16:00.000-04:00

This is what my LE is up to these days...

"Mommy, look what I did!"

It's pretty darn cute to watch her work so adamantly at flipping over...(except when she wants to practice all night long, of course). Her new move shows off her chubby little thighs, which are her best feature these days. Really it's quite mind boggling to think about much how LE is learning and how quickly she's learning it. I watch her look at her feet and just wonder how much longer until she realizes she can grab them. Everyday is something new and fun.

vay.cay.tion

2011-09-17T19:35:00.000-04:00

We've been traveling seeing family and on vacation for the last coupe of weeks. Here's pics from our family travels to Tybee Island, GA...

Airports make us tired.

LE was an awesome air traveler!

My mommy makes me look like a senior citizen at the beach.

Grammy and LE with their floppy hats.

At my cousin's beach wedding.

Uncle Alex wears baby LE with style.

As amazing as LE is at traveling, she isn't so amazing at sleeping on vacation. We some how went from 10 hours a night to waking every 2 hours to feed. However, this blog isn't the place for complaining about silly little baby changes. Because really...when you look at that face how can one complain? My motto has been "This too shall pass." whenever things seem tough and then I remind myself that someday I will miss these night time moments together.

that's so high school

2011-09-01T20:54:00.000-04:00

So, remember this post? (It's all about dreaming I'm in high school and forgetting to go to class. Oh, and forgetting to breastfeed my baby. Ha. Like that's possible!)

Guess what I dream about now...

I'm in high school...again...as the current me of 28 years old, master's degree, husband, baby....and I keep forgetting to take my breast pump to school with me. I panic and call my dad in a tissy about how I need to pump and could he please bring it to school for me?

Silly.

no more tears

2011-08-29T10:02:00.001-04:00

I thought life was great at the 6-8 week mark, but then we hit 3 months. 3 months is beautiful. A good friend (thanks, cupcake for moose!) said that motherhood would be even better at 3 months and she was right! Now not only do I feel like my new life is doable and enjoyable, but I can't get enough my sweet LE. Some days are hard, don't get me wrong, but for the most part I look at her and think "I get to hang out with you all day and skip out on work. How did I get so lucky?!" I love her more than I imagined possible. I love watching her grow into her own little person each day. For example, this weekend she started to "laugh"...it sounds like she's gurgling spit in her throat, but still she's laughing and it's adorable! Oh magical 3 months, you're pretty great.

Now when I see mom's during the first month post partum, I cringe a little for them. Because, if we're all honest, it just plain sucks. PPD or not, no one's having fun. But it gets better. I didn't believe it at the time, but everyone was right. It did get better. I still feel anxious from time to time, but more of a "normal" anxiousness. And I can't remember the last time I cried, which feels so good to say. And now I'm the person telling new moms "What you're doing is insanely tough, but it's going to get better. I know you don't believe me, but I promise it'll get better!"

Asleep in her stroller, not bad for the baby that couldn't be put down a few weeks earlier.

Cheesin with daddy.

Happy 3 months, LE! We survived :-)

(Our celebration today includes a round of shots...and not the fun kind. Sorry, baby.)

capturing baby

2011-08-25T13:28:00.000-04:00

LE at 2 months and some change...

Yeah, my daddy adores me.

I'm too hot and tired to lift my head, but I'll give you some puppy dog eyes.

Awww...chubby little thighs, aren't they the best?

No smiles for LE. It was extremely hot out, we were all a sweaty mess. She definitely wasn't feeling a photo session that day, but her serious face is still so darn cute! Don't you just want to reach through your computer screen and give her a big kiss? Lucky me, I can do that right now.

**Photos by Akiea Gross (check out her website if your local - she's young, fresh, and energetic, and has great prices!)

i feel the earth move under my feet, i feel the sky tumbling down

2011-08-23T15:56:00.001-04:00

LE and I had our first earthquake experience together today. We were at Mom's Group...conveniently held at a hospital. Luckily we didn't require any hospital services, but can't beat that location for one's first earthquake. LE was breastfeeding and continued about her business throughout the commotion. See a boob really does solve everything! For a baby at least... Later I came home to our big leaf picture like this:

If I would have been home there's a 90% chance I would have been sitting underneath this photo and would have been bonked on the head by it!

Good thing LE hates to stay home and fusses all the time...right?

Hope everyone's earthquake experience was as carefree as LE's was!

just another manic monday

2011-08-22T20:22:00.001-04:00

It's back to school, back to work week in our house. I always dread the Engineer's semesters. Now even more so than before. Can you believe I used to be such a whiner about being "bored" while the Engineer was gone? Now look at me, I dream of being bored! Heck I even dream of having 1 hour to go to the gym. Now I shall whine about having no "off" time from LE 2 nights a week.

Going back to work is actually exciting. It's only once a week or every two weeks, so it's a welcomed break. My only concern is the...dun dun duhhh BOTTLE! LE isn't terribly fond of the bottle. She'll take it, but she acts like she's choking. As with any profession, I was a better preacher than practicer with the bottle. I met for lunch with my coworkers the other day and told them about LE's bottle problem. They asked "Have you been giving her a bottle everyday?" I replied shyly "...once a week." Followed by "Julie! You know better."

Yeah, I know better, but I'm lazy.

The boob is so easy. You're hungry, here have some preheated, premade boob food. You're tired, here have a boob it'll help you fall asleep. You're fussy, here calm down to a boob. If only I could leave one with the Engineer!

cousin love

2011-08-18T10:07:00.000-04:00

Really, is there anything better?

Has anyone ever seen the Scrubs episode where JD says a box of kittens can cure anything and he orders "A box of kittens stat!" for a patient that is coding? They pour the box of kittens on the patient's chest, which then brings the patient back to life. Well the Engineer and I always say "A box of babies, stat!" anytime we feel down. Baby therapy...it's the new retail therapy in our house.

baby wearing

2011-08-12T11:36:00.000-04:00

It seems good in theory, but rather hard to figure out, and then before you know it wearing your kid is easy smeasy and you wonder why anyone would do it differently. We have ended up with 5 baby carriers since LE made her arrival. This may seem excessive, but we use them all (that is the ones that are age appropriate) each week...if not everyday some days.

The brothers wearing their babies. BIL in a Bjorn-style carrier and the Engineer in the Moby Wrap.

MOBY WRAP
A must have. This long piece of fabric seems intimidating at first, but once you get the hang of it it becomes second nature. It's perfect for a carrying a newborn. Now it's perfect for us for "You need to take a nap, grumpypants."

Auntie Sarah sporting the Maya Ring Sling (very fitting name, if I do say so!)

MAYA RING SLING
I like the ease of use this carrier provides. It's great for in out of the car, stores, lunch dates, etc. It doesn't provide much support for the user, so not great for long walks. I don't like to share this carrier, because it is more difficult to resize between users. I've actually currently retired this one for awhile because my right shoulder/back region is sore from wearing this one too much on only my right side.

Our borrowed Bjorn.

BJORN
A generous neighbor lent us this carrier. We've found it helpful for the not so newborn, but too small for the Ergo, stage. This one is mesh and very breathable, which has been a blessing with all this heat! It's very simple to use and to change the sizing between users. However, it does cause more back pain when worn for too long and it's hard to comfortably sit in a chair wearing this carrier. I can see how it won't be of much use once LE gains a few more lbs.

**The last two are very similar. They provide great back support, distributing the weight over you back and hips - very ergonomic. They allow you to carry the baby on your front or back. My understanding from other moms is that these are the carriers they use long term from the baby stage all the way through toddlerhood.

Being social activists in the Beco Carrier

BECO
This carrier has a simple fabric insert that makes it usable with an infant. It also has a variety of fabrics and colors that you can choose from to custom make this carrier to fit your personality. We were given this one by another generous friend who didn't need it any longer. I've loved using the Beco and I have even learned to breastfeed in it!

ERGO
We haven't used this carrier yet. It requires an infant insert that is large and rather hot for the Summer months. It'll be usable in a couple of months and I think we'll like it at least as much as the Beco. The Engineer may like it even more since it doesn't have the girly pattern on the front. The Ergo also seems to have more cushy shoulder and waist straps.

Pros to wearing your baby: It leaves you hands free! Wearing your baby allows you to go about your "normal" life. The baby can look around, have a snack, or fall asleep...with little to no effort on your part. Not having to figure out how to open doors, deal with stairs, etc like you do with a stroller. Never lugging an infant car seat around! You can kiss the top of your baby's head whenever you want!

Cons: Our baby isn't terribly fond of the car seat or stroller...she prefers to be worn. It's hard to eat at a table when wearing a baby. While a good work out, it can be tiring to tote around the extra weight. It's hot during the Summer...leaving us all a sweaty mess by the end of the day!

Happy Baby Wearing!!

trading babies

2011-08-09T11:04:00.001-04:00

I'm going to be honest here...The Engineer and I strongly wanted to trade LE for our niece Lily for a while. Lily is more than just adorable, she's a peaceful blob-like baby that falls asleep in your arms and seems to rarely cry. LE on the other hand is always kicking and punching, fussing, and screaming. And in the beginning she would never just fall asleep in our arms...we had to work for it - walks, bouncing for hours, shooshing, etc.

In the last few weeks we've not only decided we'll keep our little LE, but we're now worried our future children won't be as great as her! So, she still may fuss and kick around a good bit, and even be a little work to put down for naps and night time, but the girl can SLEEP like nobody's business these days. She has consistently been going about 9 hours every night for a few weeks. She then gets up for an hour to eat and play and goes back down for another 2-3 hours. It's unreal. Really it's almost unheard of for an exclusively breastfeed baby to sleep such a long stretch this early on with zero sleep training. She just did it herself. One morning we woke up and looked at each other with that "holy smokes, what just happened" face and before we knew it that became our new routine.

I read some where (sorry, don't remember exactly where) that you have to figure out what your new normal is with each baby and each change. I love our new normal and have been afraid to say it out loud in fear of jinxing it or making other parents severely jealous of all our sleep.

Yesterday at the grocery store some dad was chit chatting with me about LE and telling me about his 5 month old and making small talk about getting sleep. When he asked if I was getting any, I generically answered "She does pretty well at night." He proceeded to proudly tell me his baby only wakes up twice a night, but informed me that I had a ways to go before I would get that much sleep. And I just let it be. I'd rather not tell anyone how amazing my baby is and just pretend we are still the average sleep deprived parents (which we may become again at any moment, anyway).

So, now I wonder...how do I reproduce again in fear the next baby won't be as great at sleeping as LE. Funny, it wasn't that long ago we said if the next baby was as needy and fussy as LE we would have to stop at 2 kids!

Either way, I will say to myself "Figure out your new normal and move on, already."

Cousin love with LE and Lily:

Brothers and their babies (Lily 5 mo, Maya 2 mo).

Smile for the camera...

Hey!

I want to clobber you...

Now, now, hands to yourselves, girls.

I want in on the baby fun!

Smile everyone! Fine, that will have to do.

I suppose this will be what family photos will look like for the next several years, cute none the less.

eating locally

2011-08-06T12:38:00.003-04:00

LE and I ventured downtown DC today to join in on the BIG Latch On and to see the Big Pink Bus (http://www.milkforthought.com/).

Latching on for at least 1 minute with mommas all over the US at the same time (we even made a little local news)!

With Ryan, the guy behind it all (thanks for joining us Joanna!!).

why i love breastfeeding my little engineer...

2011-08-04T15:34:00.000-04:00

Well for starters she makes so many adorable faces...Like her "Wow, I get to do this again!" excited face, or her "I'm starving" little-piggy-don't-mess with me face, or her sweet little eyebrow raises when more milk starts to flow for her, and of course, my favorite, sleep feeding with the occasional pause to give me a big gummy smile while her eyes are still closed. (I started to try to capture all these faces in photos, but I failed and realized that many shots of my breast would probably be too much for my readers anyway...)

It's easy and I'm lazy, so I'm grateful for no prep or cleanup!

It's free and the Engineer and I are rather cheap, so this is a huge perk for us.

If she has a boob in her mouth she can't scream. And trust me LE likes to scream.

It gives us lots of eye contact and snugly bonding time - LE eats every 1/2 hour to 2 hours during the daytime. Time has become irrelevant in my world. She eats when she's hungry for however long she wants to (there are certainly pros and cons to this "on demand" method). She rarely wants to cuddle otherwise, so I appreciate the forced "if you want to eat you have to cuddle" time!

It (hopefully) makes me a more empathetic Lactation Consultant.

And that's all for now. Happy World Breastfeeding Week!

it's world breastfeeding week people!

2011-08-01T09:32:00.000-04:00

And because it is, I shall post accordingly this week.

My question for you is what does S&M gear have in common with nursing clothing? Or better yet, I should say that I am going to answer this question for you.

via

My first day postpartum I put on my brand new Target nursing tank...you know the navy blue one with the cream lace at the top. I have it on in about every photo of me these days, or at least one similar to it. I pulled down the little flap, exposing my breast for my hungry little LE. BFF Sarah, looking perplexed, asked "What is that thing?" (referring to my shirt, not my breast :-). I explained the obvious and she decided "It was awfully S&M like." Then the Engineer piped in "We'll have to save those shirts for later." (Ummm last thing on any one's mind 1 day post birthing my gorgeous 6lb bowling ball). I replied "Trust me we're both going to be sick of my nursing tanks before this over with." And we are indeed sick of these tanks only 2 months in. By the end of the day they reek of sour milk and are stained with spit up and maybe a splash of urine or poo - reminding us that these (really the tanks, but we could probably say the boobs too) are for LE and not the Engineer.

So, that's it. Contrary to what we usually consider socially appropriate, S&M clothing and nursing tanks cover you up and expose only the necessary parts. Of course, one comes in leather and the other a cotton/poly blend.

Happy Breastfeeding Week!

it's the end of an era

2011-07-28T11:09:00.000-04:00

In preparation for the postpartum period, we bought a huge stack of disposable plates, bowls, cups, and utensils. (If you're uber green and cringing at this - we use cloth diapers, which has to have covered the dent the disposable ware made n the environment at least 20 times over). This stack has managed to last us a complete 2 months. A glorious 2 months of NO dishes, except pots and pans (and luckily even that has been low thanks to all the amazing food that has been brought to us by Church members, coworkers, friends and family)!! The Engineer wants to switch solely to using paper products, and as much as I'm tempted to say "YES!", we need to be grown ups and wash our dishes...for the love of all that is right (and cheaper) in the world.

It's a day of mourning in the kitchen of the shoebox condo.

And because I can't resist...

anything but the carseat

2011-07-26T07:36:00.000-04:00

In the midst of trying to stay "baby minimalist" we bought (or I should say registered for) a convertible car seat that fits 5-65lbs. Figuring it would get us through to the next kid (next kid?!? yeah, we don't go there these days...). Many people insisted I would regret not having the infant carrier seat, but I always insisted back that I would hate carrying that thing from our garage to the elevator and then down our long hall. Life looks a little different when you live in a shoebox condo compared to that of my Midwest family and suburban friends, you see. The downside has been that LE is a little less than fond of spending time in her car seat.

Ahhh...is there anything worse than a baby screaming her head off while stuck in traffic? I currently can't think of one darn thing (I can already hear the Engineer saying "That's a little dramatic.")

The other day at my Mom's Group someone shared the best thing I've heard all week:

roll down the back seat window or turn the radio to a static station (aka create some white noise)

It's amazing how sounds that used to drive me crazy now are music to my ears if it means my baby shuts up! And I mean that in the most endearing way possible.

happy birthday to us both

2011-07-24T21:41:00.000-04:00

Today I turn 28 years old and LE turns 8 weeks old.

We had several people assure us fussiness for the baby (and adjusting to motherhood for the momma) peaks around 6-8 weeks and then greatly improves. It felt like an eternity away when we first heard this, but some how we managed to survive. All this week the Engineer and I have been looking at each other and asking "Whose baby is this?" I almost took her to the doctor because I was sure she must be sick since she wasn't crying and demanding walks all day long. Is it weird that at one point I was comforted when she started to fuss in the evening? ..."Ah, there's my baby. I guess she isn't sick after all!"

Reading with daddy...and actually sitting through a whole book!

Looking pretty with momma.

And so many smiles. Oh how I love smiles.

What a great birthday present. We've peaked!

how to become social

2011-07-13T10:15:00.001-04:00

LE and I at our New Mom's Group...

**You can't see it here, but LE was a naked baby at mom's group that day due to a huge blowout and a mom who didn't think to pack a backup outfit. I'm learning slowly but surely how to do this mom thing...

I'm typically not terribly social. The Engineer and I are the type of people who do not have many friends, but a handful of really close friends that are stuck with us for life. My goal after having LE was to make some mommy friends in our area. I decided that for me to be a good stay at home mom, LE and I were going to need to get out and have interaction with other babies and mommas. That way when the Engineer comes home from work I have something to talk about other than how many poopy diapers LE had that day.

My two rules for my new job:

Put on makeup (at least mascara at some point during the day)
Get out of the house everyday (even if it's just going to the grocery store).

So, as out of character as it may be, I have been getting other mom's emails and phone numbers as I pass them in our apartment complex or in the neighborhood. It's kind of like dating...in an odd way. When the Engineer comes home I will proudly announce that I got another number that day. I now have 4 new friends in our neighborhood! It's hard to imagine that we went 2 years not knowing any of our neighbors.

A baby really does change everything!

cleaning the soul

2011-07-10T15:47:00.000-04:00

Becoming a new mom is like starting a new job...that you never get to leave. Not that it's a bad thing, it just makes the adjustment hard if your not great at dealing with changes. I remember how tough it was for me to go from my full time job to being per diem in my new career as a lactation consultant (which meant I only worked a few days a month). I felt so uncomfortable not having each day filled. It took me several months to adjust to that schedule and to get over the feeling like I wasn't "contributing" enough to the household. Then I became part time and I actually grew to like my fluffy life. It became very comfortable and I was thankful for it during my pregnancy (which everyone knows how much I loved that stage of life). So, as with every change in life, the post partum period has been challenging for me as well. I went from my fluffy life with part time work to a 24 hour, stuck for life job that required a lack of sleep and a lack of alone time or personal space.

One night I realized I was leaving out an important element in my "recovery" process. I believe God can preform miracles in our lives, so why during this time of need wasn't I turning to God more? I imagined God our Father comforting me and helping me sleep the same way the Engineer and I do with LE every night. Then I imagined God scrubbing the anxiousness out of my soul and pouring in His peace. Since this day, the Engineer and I have started doing a little devotion and prayer at night together. It's times like these that you realize how the lows in life strengthen you and make you better. As the Engineer and I reflect on our relationship, it's always been our trials that have really brought us closer and made us stronger. As much as we hate to go through them, we are thankful for the greater love that grows.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
-Philippians 4:6-7

And I guess I'll have no choice but to adjust to being a new mom, because, well get a look at this cuteness...

She's got the tiniest little frog butt, and cloth diapers, well aren't they just adorable?

Oh, and that face...I could just eat it up!

Today and everyday, I am thankful to be LE's momma!

why babies provide free entertainment

2011-07-05T20:18:00.000-04:00

We are sitting in Church (yes, we've made it two weeks in a row!) and during prayer our grunty little girl has a huge explosion in her nappy, followed by her incredibly loud hiccups...putting everyone around us in giggles.

And I get to hang out with her all day long.

We had a nice weekend, just the three of us. We've been so caught up in figuring LE out and getting me better that we haven't really had much time to just hang out and bond. It was a very relaxing weekend together...just enjoying our new little family.

A classic LE face (with a daddy in the background...yes, we are the only family who frequents the pool almost daily, but still manages to hang on to our pasty whiteness).

I dipped LE's toes in the water, but she wasn't too impressed.

it was more than the baby blues

2011-06-25T20:47:00.000-04:00

Today I had a good day. I'd say my best one yet since LE was born. It involved a day with my Engineer and bestie, Sarah, and of course my baby. I slept well last night, took a nap, went for a swim, got a massage, and even fit in some long desired family photos (which means somehow we all got showered, dressed, and no one was crying).

We've had some adjusting to life as new parents pains. LE is what Dr. Sears describes as a "high needs baby." The girl doesn't like to relax and she'll let you know if you're not doing something quite right (which usually is taking her outside for a walk in her carrier). But supposedly the "high needs" ones become very sensitive little people. She's just like her momma...a little on the needy side. She's got my hair, eyes, mouth, body, and personality. I think the Engineer is probably a little concerned about two high maintenance women and praying for a boy next time around.

I was quite teary for the first couple of weeks after LE was born. Mostly concerned that LE was in pain or uncomfortable. I was checking on her and worrying more than sleeping. Then last week, just as LE seemed to be getting better and into more of a groove, I started to lose mine. I became incredibly anxious and stopped being able sleep all together. It was only a period of a couple of days, but it was scary and taking care of a newborn in such an exhausted state was almost impossible. Luckily, I have a very supportive midwife and now an incredible therapist who helped me get back on track and learn to manage my anxiety and sleeping problems, a.k.a. Postpartum Depression. I also must say a big thank you to my parents and Sarah for coming out to help take care of Maya and get me well!

This has been one of the most trying experiences of my life, but I know it takes the lows to help us appreciate the highs in life. LE is certainly a high for the Engineer and I, and I'm looking forward to enjoying her more and more each day!

m.r.o.

2011-06-24T16:38:00.001-04:00

So, it's been a rough week and I'm just now getting to my Father's Day post for the Engineer... (of course, I think he'll understand since he's been part of the week with me.)

It's been fun to watch the Engineer become a dad. He's pretty great at it. The other day he took our noisy LE for a three hour walk, so I could sleep in peace after a rough night. I'm pretty sure I fell 10 times more in love with him for that.

LE loves her daddy. They make faces at each other (she's such a serious little thing with the most perplex looks sometimes) and he blows raspberries on her belly and face (even though she doesn't quite fully appreciate this one yet...give it a month or so and I'm sure he'll have her giggling).

The Engineer and LE have something special in common. Their initials match, making them both MRO.

Nap time with daddy.

A close up on that cute face.

Not happy about having to be burped. (Father's day onesie!)

But daddy is the best at it!

Happy (belated blog post) Father's Day, babe. I couldn't have picked a better babydaddy!

**I'll leave you with a great article the Engineer shared with me on how fathers parent differently and why it's important.

she's so adorable

2011-06-15T16:21:00.000-04:00

But you already knew that...

Big yawns.

Little feet.

And now for the 2nd most adorable thing ever...

LE got her very first package in the mail this week. I know, you're thinking what I'm thinking "The girl is only 2 weeks old!" But apparently LE makes friends fast.

My college friend turned blog friend, from Indiana, had a baby girl this year too. You should check out their adorableness at http://www.acupcakeformoose.com/.

Etsy presents are always the best - Thanks Mama Moose and Cricket!

when the babes is fussy

2011-06-11T21:12:00.000-04:00

We totally can't wait to get in the pool...

For starters our increasingly fussy LE is quiet there and it's as hot as balls outside, so swimming would be a nice alternative to walks.

LE loves having daddy wear her.

Doesn't she have a bit of a summo wrestler look with her cloth diaper on?

Baby smiles.

the wolfpack

2011-06-09T21:11:00.000-04:00

LE meets her family...

"and we're the three best friends that anyone could have..." Seriously, does it get any cuter?

Cousin kisses.

For all of you who were amused by my brother's squeamishness with pregnancy and babies... I definitely had to pose him with her, but aren't you proud? I certainly was. She pooped while he was holding her :-) He called me later that day, because he couldn't stop thinking about how I actually have a baby now. I think it might take him a couple of visits to process his new love (yes, brother, that feeling you are experiencing is indeed what they call LOVE).

Grammy and Pap.

Auntie Sarah (I think these two have some kind of soul connection...as Auntie Sarah can sense things about Maya...such as her birthday).

Opa.

She also met her Auntie Amy, Uncle Micah, and Oma, but we some how managed to not get the pics of them on our camera. Thanks everyone for visiting Maya and loving on her!

when a lactation consultant breastfeeds

2011-06-07T16:01:00.000-04:00

Well first lets just say "ouch"...

(I'd like to preface this post by saying breastfeeding is hard and I know each mom has her own story and those stories don't always end happy. There's enough mommy guilt out there, so if breastfeeding didn't work for you it's my sincere wish that this post doesn't provoke any mommy guilt for you. Breastfeeding is NOT a precursor to being a great mom!)

When LE (Little Engineer on this blog or Maya if you see her on the street) first latched on after delivery my first reaction was "That's what a strong tug feels like!" We did the breast crawl, which allowed LE to crawl from my abdomen to breast and latch herself. Yep a newborn can indeed do this (especially after an uncomplicated, natural delivery). The girl hasn't skipped a feeding since. She ate 15 times in her first 24 hours...hence the "ouch". I had a little bit of bleeding and bruising, but it all cleared up once the milk was in and my bowling ball boobs settled down. (Going up 2 cup sizes overnight is also a bit painful...). So, lesson being even if you know exactly how to get that perfect latch and what everything should feel like...it still doesn't always go perfectly textbook.

It's been really weird to experience all that I've read in books and have been teaching moms the last several years. I definitely have a gained a new sense of empathy, especially for the desperation that mom's feel in those first couple of days.

LE has been an amazing feeder from the first latch. Mostly that is luck, but I also can't imagine not knowing all I know about breastfeeding. About 3 or 4 times a day I give the Engineer and myself a lecture. It's starts like this: "Ok, here's what I would tell my patients...." He knows this is when he needs to listen up. It's for both of us, which may seem weird, but I need to hear these things too...even if it is from myself. For example, I gave us the Second Night Syndrome lecture right before we went to bed on our 2nd night. And it was a good thing I did, because even though I knew it was normal I still about lost it in the midst of a baby that just screamed and screamed all night.

Now things with breastfeeding are starting to feel on the up and up. And it's t:he followings moments that make feeding every 1-2 hours, "ouch" latches, sore nipples, and bowling ball boobs seem more than ok:

Looking up at momma through the corner of her eye.

Milk drunk, followed by big gummy smiles (that I haven't been able to capture via camera yet...)

And that, my friends, makes it all worth it.

maya's birthday

2011-06-03T18:08:00.001-04:00

It started around 8 am with a little pre-church hanky panky. I felt crampy, but had been feeling that on and off, so I went about the day as usual. I did some laundry and dishes and then we went to church. After church the Engineer asked me how I felt and I said "Still crampy, but it's on and off". He gave me a funny look and said "You mean you're having contractions?" I replied "No, just crampy." I called Sarah to let her know I was crampy and maybe things would be happening in a day or two. She assured me she had a feeling the baby was coming that day. She felt it in her bones. I didn't put much stock in that feeling, because, well I was a first time mom and it would probably be a really long delivery. We then ran some errands to finish off the to do list I was constantly creating. After lunch the Engineer bargained for a nap, as I was keeping us constantly busy. I let him sleep for an hour and then we went for a 2.5 mile walk. (In which I would like to note the Engineer couldn't keep up with me on...it was hot in his defense and I was clearly pumped up with adrenaline).

Pre-walk, last in front of mirror pregnant photo.

On the second 1/2 of our walk I started to have more intense "cramps" and would have to slow down my walking speed during them. I finally decided that when we got back we should call the midwife and let her know what had been going on that day. After speaking to the midwife she told me to make sure I slept well that night as I would probably be having a baby in 24 hours (this was around 5pm). Since our walk was so boiling hot we decided to take a swim and I got in to do a few laps while the Engineer just dangled his feet in the water and laid back to rest (again I was exhausting the poor guy...). I was finding that I would have to stop swimming to breathe through my "cramps." (still wasn't ready to call them "contractions" yet.) Once we got back to our condo and I took a shower I decided things were getting more intense and we should call our midwife, birth assistant and Sarah. This was maybe around 6pm (from here on out time is fuzzy). Our midwife, Story, said she would come over to check me and see how far along I was. Maybe another 30 minutes or so went by and I informed the Engineer I felt like I was pushing. He rushed to prepare our place and try to comfort me and direct everyone to our place. It wasn't much longer before I felt a pop and gushing water (just like in the movies, which everyone swears never happens...). Once Story was there she decided not to check me since my water had broke. She was trying to get all her supplies together and ready when I said "I feel like the baby is bulging" and sure enough her head was there. Story informed me I could have a baby in two pushes, but it wouldn't be a good idea because I would probably tear. Luckily our birth assistant, Mary Beth, arrived soon after to finish preparing while Story focused on me doing warm compresses on my perineum and directing me on how to push in order to avoid any tearing. Another hour and some change later of pushing and we had a baby. I was in a squatting position and reached down and caught her myself.

I had the baby in our bed (I know everyone is curious about this since it was a home birth) and I moved in and out of side lying and a squatting position. All I could say throughout the process was that I wish I could have a break...just a couple of minutes in between contractions, because it was so intense. The Engineer tells me that at one point Story said I was amazing at birth, to which I replied in a pathetic mumble "That's good because we're going to have lots of babies."

It was insanely intense and so fast that I felt like I couldn't comprehend what was going on. The Engineer tried to suggest things from our list of birthing techniques, but I could only close my eyes and survive each contraction. At one point he put in my relaxation c.d. and with in 15 seconds I was like "no." He did an amazing job coordinating everyone, setting up our video camera (Auntie Sarah, who was meant to video tape, didn't make it on time, although, her instinct was incredibly correct.), and comforting me. I remember thinking I must be doing ok by his positive feedback. It was the most beautiful, whirlwind birth ever and I am so thankful we got to experience in the comfort of our own home with the constant care of a midwife and birth assistant. I honestly couldn't have dreamed of a more perfect birth (Not that I'm dying to do it again anytime soon...). The female body is amazing. I'm in awe of what my body was able to do. My only advice is exercise, exercise, exercise - I really think this was a huge factor in my birth experience.

Story and Mary Beth weighing Maya.

I'll leave you with a few photos that we've taken since Maya's beautiful birthday.

Skin to skin with daddy. We spend a lot of time naked around here.

Daddy comforting Maya. I must tell you that this girl completely adores the Engineer. She could sleep on his chest forever. That is until boobs pop in her mind and then she wants me. I'm pretty sure that's all she sees when she looks at me.

Skin to skin with momma.

Our first non-medical outing. A walk in the park.

We love you Maya Rosslyn!

meet the new boss

2011-05-30T20:34:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the world Maya Rosslyn! We are excited to announce that Maya arrived at 9:52pm last night, May 29. She weighed in at a perfect 6 lbs 9 oz, and 19 inches. Mom handled it like a rock star, and everyone is doing wonderfully. Maya had a whirlwind entry into the world.

-The Engineer

P.S. We have it on good authority that she is indeed the cutest baby in the world, and I am inclined to agree.

no more hang ups, or hangovers for that matter

2011-05-28T22:10:00.000-04:00

We decided to have a day of fun on our potential last week as a twosome. It was kind of like our day of spending Marcus' birthday $100 and ironically that was one of first pregnant weekends (even though we didn't realize it at the time...).

The day began with a stop for a "nutritional" breakfast.

Followed by some kayaking around Roosevelt Island.

We actually tried to pick up some ice cream cones, but Hershey's Ice Cream Shop in Georgetown doesn't open until 11am and it was 10am. Crazy talk. So, we settled for some iced drinks at Starbucks in Old Town instead.

After an afternoon of resting and cleaning up we went for a movie. Movie of choice: Hangover Part II. Not terribly recommended by myself or the Engineer (and we loved the first one)...it does show a lot of man bits, if that's your thing. Next was dinner at a French Bistro. Here's our left over dessert. Yes, we ordered that much dessert that there were left overs.

I was told that if you're trying to finish a project or have some sort of psychological barrier that you can delay your baby's arrival. I think I had been thinking about my last day of work (which was yesterday), followed by my day of fun with my Engineer. Now I have nothing to hold me back.

Two very happy faces, ready for their babygirl to make them a family of three.

tuesday has a 5% chance of baby

2011-05-26T14:19:00.000-04:00

It's so weird to answer the following question "When are you due?" with a simple "Tuesday." Of course I've always liked to state my due date as a range...."Late May, early June." However, people are less satisfied with this response as we enter into the midst of late May. But really, come on, all that Tuesday means is that I have a 5% chance of having the baby on that day.

It's surreal how soon it is until we will actually meet our LE. In some ways I truly feel like I'm just going to pregnant forever. Every time I get a weird feeling or crampy we both start acting a little strange. The first time it happened we just looked at each other and with our eyes said "Could this be happening? I'm not ready yet!" Then the Engineer grabbed a beer and I went to bed early. (Apparently this is how we deal with these types of situations). The second time I started to freak out on the Engineer. "I don't think I can do this. What if I can't do it?" Then I realized I just needed to poop. Now we are getting used to these 'false labor' signs...making us more prepared for the real thing to come.

We are ready for d-day, because it will bring us such a dag-gone cute prize; however, we have really been enjoying our down time. Remember how I told you the Engineer finished his semester and I was going to have him all to myself every evening? Well it's pretty much amazing. All attention is on me and quite frankly, I'm enjoying our current situation. So, we're excited for our baby to come any day, but not impatient to rush away our last days of just the two of us, sans baby and grad school. (Oh can you even imagine baby and grad school together...ugh...we'll worry about that later.)

I leave you with my list of things I'm doing to keep my body ready for the marathon to come, as well as help encourage my body to enter into the land of baby delivering:

Walk
Stairs (two at a time)
The thing that we did to make the baby - Turns out sex can be an effective method for getting the baby out.
Hand expressing colostrum (the first milk) - This can help stimulate labor, but it also helps to create a better supply of colostrum. I collect mine in little colostrum bottles just in case we have to supplement the baby for any reason after birth. You can typically start doing this once you're full term, but ask your OB/midwife first. For help learning to hand express check out this video by Dr. Jane Morton. (Ok, so maybe you're now just thinking I'm a crazy lactation person, but you did read my blog title before you started reading, correct?)
Swim - Specifically the breast stroke. In the pool you get to be cold and weightless...what could be better than that when your pregnant?
Child's Pose and Cat/Cow from yoga - These positions help encourage the baby to stay in the proper face down position. You've heard about those 'sunny side up' bambinos? Not a good thing, I understand.
Evening Primrose Oil - I'm taking 3 capsules a day orally per midwife instructions (I understand you start doing putting this on your cervix after 40 weeks).
Red Raspberry Leaf Tea - Helps tone the uterus.

39 weeks.

Now the question is...Will LE be a May or June baby?

a day on the mall

2011-05-24T09:23:00.000-04:00

We spent last Saturday with BIL, SIL, and the nieces on the National Mall. It makes for the perfect place to picnic, fly some kites, and take a nap. The Engineer and I realized we need to work on our parenting skills after two mishaps. We had a cheap kite and bubbles to entertain Ada, however, they were a little on the faulty side. Our kite had no string (fortunately SIL was prepared and had a back up kite) and the next day I discovered our bubbles had no wand.

Me: Ada, I can't find the wand.
Ada: Look harder, Aunt Julie.
Me: Um....I'm sorry kido. Let's go inside and find a ball. Won't it be fun to play ball out here?

Lucky for me she's a sweet 3 year old and can be distracted by the next thing pretty easily. But I'm seeing a future of a very disappointed LE if don't get our act together... Parenting lesson #1: Distraction. You mess up, a melt down is around the corner, think quickly and distract, distract, distract.

Miss Ada being all grown up... She was loving her metro ride and all the planes taking off.

Lilly Bell was such a good sport.

SIL and her girls.

Apparently kite flying is tiring...

The merry-go-round

Such a sweet family!

37 weeks and baby room

2011-05-21T11:59:00.000-04:00

I've decided 37 weeks is my start of feeling "pregnant;" you know like phrases such as ugh, I'm so pregnant when I try to get off the couch are coming out of my mouth. The aches and pains are settling in, some swelling is starting to show, a slight waddle in my walk, and an excitement building to meet my little LE. (please note, I still stand by pregnancy is awesome... give me a couple of weeks and maybe I'll change my mind.)

The good news is 37 weeks also signifies that we are officially in the range for a home birth delivery. The moon is going to be full on Tuesday the 19th...just sayin. You may find me outside basking in the moon's gravitational pull that evening.

I'm finally ready to introduce to you our nursery. Welcome to your picture tour...

Entering LE's room, which happens to double as the guest room, too.

Our functional/travelable baby bed (Thanks, Oma).

A stimulating mobile (good gift, Grammy), with handmade giraffe paintings in the background (by Auntie Sarah).

Our reading nook complete with a bouncy seat that turns into a toddler rocking chair.

Extra storage on top of LE's wardrobe.

Now this I am quite proud of: Couch bed...my solution for keeping a guest bed in an already tiny nursery.

Homemade pillows...Let's just say I have no desire to make a pillow anytime soon. (Bird pillow is from etsy courtesy of Grammy).

Pictures of all LE's friends and family that she can't wait to meet!

Books make great decorations! LE's growth chart on the door to the right (again, thanks Grammy!).

I'm not sure nursery is the right word for this room. Our goal was to keep it baby minimalist, gender neutral, toddler friendly, and functional (some how giraffes snuck into the mix too). Thanks to everyone who contributed gifts and talents!

Now all we need is a baby to add to the room!

mr. clean apparently lives here

2011-05-21T11:56:00.000-04:00

What to say when one's husband asks "How come every time you clean the countertops they look dirtier than before?"

The Engineer probably won't admit it, but he takes pride in sealing and buffing our kitchen and bathroom countertops. The worst part about being a part-time career woman (and soon to be stay at home mom) is all the household chores became mine. The shoebox is small, so it's really not that big of a deal, but there were things that the Engineer was better at, such as floors and countertops.

38 weeks.

We're about ready to roll into 39 weeks and it's weird to now think of delivery as approaching any hour to 3 weeks away. There's the constant desire to keep the house tidy, the laundry caught up, and the to do list done. There's also the excitement to meet LE, followed by my shallow sadness of losing my pregnant body and being left with one that's not quite so cute. Then there's the getting pumped up to birth, followed by the freak out of I'm not ready to do this...isn't there another way?

Welcome to the waiting game...

tidbits

2011-05-15T22:54:00.000-04:00

A brief weekend recap...
-High school friends Edna and Sarah, plus Sarah's BF Marques (aka Marques #2) visited
-Beautiful baby belly art was made, but you already knew that.
-The Engineer and Marques had our carseats inspected by the Police department and were mistaken as a couple. Isn't that cute?
-Edna read taro cards and LE's says she is the flower of lovers. Her past lives were ones of suppression and she has possibilities in her future. (I know, please don't judge that I've already let LE dive into the Taro world.)
-LE got lots of loving. She even showed her hiccups off for the girls.
-Edna did health histories for everyone. We all need digestive enzymes. We all probably have parasites.
-I insulted Edna's super tight short yoga shorts that look like my underwear. Feelings were hurt, but then laughs were had. I am after all the conservative one...
-Sarah responded to a grand mal seizure on the Tripper bus.
-Edna puts green powder on everything she eats...it's seaweed or something.

Edna, like always, keeps life interesting. You really just have to meet her. And Sarah and Marques are always are favorite guests. It was so good to have high school pals around, who already love my baby so much!

I leave you with some pics from our maternity photo shoot:

(36 weeks from http://www.maleknaz.com/)

baby bump lovin

2011-05-15T09:36:00.001-04:00

The tradition of baby belly painting...

Belly button 75% popped.

37 weeks.

Thanks dear friends for coming to adore and decorate my bump. You're the best!

you and me baby, we're stuck like glue

2011-05-09T21:38:00.000-04:00

Remember how I used to always blog about my patheticness and the Engineer ignoring me for grad school? Well it's that time again... With pregnancy some how I think I've been a little less pathetic (maybe someone would like to disagree...?), probably because I'm so entertained by this whole process of gestating. However, the Engineer is finishing up finals, all the baby stuff is winding down, and I'm feeling the clingy urge coming on. My body is sensing that he's going to be around every evening and it wants to be glued to his side to make up for all this lost time together. I don't know if I can stop it. I'm thinking walks and ice cream, shopping, and I'll watch you golf, and if you have to pee...I'll be there, too.

The other day I asked the Engineer "Do you want me to skip yoga so we can hang out?" and he just laughed. How rude?!

Question of the day: How to get extra time in with the Engineer without smothering the poor guy?

OR fingers crossed that my smothering is perceived as cute. That's possible, right?

when you're this close does it count?

2011-05-07T22:30:00.001-04:00

I hadn't thought much about Mother's Day for myself until my coworker asked if the Engineer was getting me anything. "Doubtful." was my response. The Engineer isn't big on holidays or gifts for that matter, so realistically I was thinking my chances of getting acknowledged were slim to none. (Not that the Engineer sucks or anything...this isn't a hate my man post. He's good to me everyday, not just when Hallmark requires it.)

Then there we were. Sitting on the red couch, watching tv - one of favorite places to be - and a DQ commercial came on brilliantly recommending getting the mother in your life an ice cream cake. I decided to cash in on this one and informed the Engineer that this looks like a great Mother's Day present. To which he said, "You're not a mother." YES, he did indeed get "the look."

I've got a bowling ball between my legs 24/7, let's not get stingy with the "mother" word.

I proceeded to tell him about my coworker's question and it turned out one of his coworkers had asked him the same thing.

Which leads me to this...

Aren't they pretty? They came with a Happy Mother-to-be Day card (yes, Hallmark knows how to capitalize on these things, and we occasionally get sucked in). I love you, homes!

Happy Mother's (and Mother-to-be) Day!

getting showered

2011-05-06T09:36:00.002-04:00

My baby shower thrown by SIL and MIL:

Note the necklace t-shirt Ada and Lily are sporting. Straight from my sewing machine.

How adorable?! Sweet play sweets from LE's Auntie and BFFs.

I have officially been thoroughly showered with love and presents. LE's room is about as complete as it's going to get. After all the presents had been opened and guests had left, Ada asked her mom "When is Aunt Julie's shower?" Isn't she cute? That is a confusing word to use to describe a party.

Thank you, SIL and MIL, for such a lovely day!

welcome to my pregnancy heaven

2011-05-03T14:11:00.001-04:00

I was in heaven yesterday. HEAVEN, I tell you! I had my very own bump photographer for the afternoon.

We've gotten one pic back so far to wet our appetites...

36 weeks

Our photographer, Naz, was amazing! She was friendly and had great ideas for creative shots. Check her site out, especially if you live in the DC or NYC area!

Get ready for a week or two of photos of me and the bump (and I even let the Engineer join in a few, too).

and the beat goes on...

2011-04-27T08:57:00.001-04:00

35 weeks.

My sweet LE is growing so big these days. Everyone says she's tiny, but I can tell she's getting bigger and stronger each day. I have a feeling she's going to shock everyone and be a decent sized baby...(or maybe I'm wrong and she is actually a little peanut). I've been working on collecting the last of our supplies. Just to wet your appetite, one needs a placenta bowl when having a home birth. I never fancied myself going out and picking out an adequate bowl for such an occasion, but life's funny like that. Don't worry though...we don't have any bizarre plans for the placenta. And then there's making a birth plan...I thought I'd love doing this, vocalizing my every wish. But it turns out it's kind of annoying and I'm not really up for planning for all the "worst case scenarios". It'd just be nice to know ahead of time if one needed to worry about such scenarios or not, in order conserve energy, don't you think?

I'm very at peace right now with my pregnancy and upcoming delivery and sleepless nights to come. It all seems so natural and at the same time such a fragile process that I'm thankful to be a part of. Honestly, it's hard to even put into words how amazing it is to be hosting new life (I know, pregnant women are smug, we really are!).

The Engineer asked me last night if being pregnant is everything I dreamed it would be and the answer is "Yes, it's even better than I dreamed." (Because originally I was worried about my organs feeling claustrophobic, but they don't so much.) Although, as much as I love being pregnant, I'm starting to become excited/anxious to meet my babygirl! Lucky for me that day is soon, very soon.

tinkle bell

2011-04-25T21:39:00.001-04:00

The Engineer red eye, sneezing, and hocking up phlegm. Me, well one big sneeze left me with a wet spot the size of a rather large pancake in my crotch region.

This was the excitement (or patheticness) of our Monday evening Spring walk.

Can some other pregnant person or mom out there please tell me they also struggled with peeing themselves in the later part of their pregnancy? I've never been known for great bladder control, but seriously...you can hardly take me out in public anymore. At least I know babygirl is head down and ready to go. Head down on my bladder making me go, that is.

According to the Engineer I make some sort of funny face when I've just peed a little. He then immitates me each time he sneezes. He thinks he's funny or something...

annapolized

2011-04-24T22:45:00.001-04:00

The Engineer and I had a lovely weekend of relaxation in Annapolis, MD. We ate, slept, ate, got massaged, slept, ate, swam, ate...and you get the point. My favorite part about going on a trip is the hotel. I love sleeping in a huge king sized bed that someone else makes for me everyday. The hotel offered a "green reward" for declining maid service. It may be the right thing to do (decline maid service and save planet earth), but I love fresh crisp sheets and towels, looking all pretty, way too much.

Chick and Ruth's diner. We got to join in the daily ritual of "I pledge allegiance..."

34 weeks. (We took no bump photos...for some odd reason).

Last trip pre-baby, but the real adventure has yet to begin...

Hope you all had a Happy Easter weekend!

wait...was that our baby?

2011-04-21T20:48:00.000-04:00

We had the fortune of having one last surprise ultrasound this week. I was so excited to see LE (Little Engineer) and to see her in 3-D, well I thought at least. It turns out we picked the no frills place: no 3-D and a tech only interested in organs and sizes. She gave me one glimpse of LE's crotch (it doesn't hurt to just confirm...) and one rather poor glimpse of her face and the next thing I knew she was done. I know this is a "medical" procedure, but don't we get to have the fun part too? You know, where we oohh and awww over my gorgeous babygirl? Guess we'll just have to wait for the real thing...D-day.

The Engineer and I have a special weekend planned, it's our staycation-ish babymoon in Annapolis, MD. We wanted to go to Miami, but our only free weekend is this coming one and Easter really put a spike on airline tickets! So, instead we booked a hotel that has a pool. Swanky move, if I do say so... Either way I end up very pregnant and in a bikini. We have planned nothing but pure relaxation. I got a confirmation today for our "PARENTS-TO-BE COUPLES MASSAGE," which made me giggle. Sounds funny, right?

Can you even believe it's 34 weeks? I know...I keep doing this. The Engineer is baffled by my amazement of this pregnancy and my desire to stay pregnant forever. Every now and then I look at my babydaddy and then my belly and ask him "Can you believe there's a baby in there? A REAL baby? And she's big and could survive! There's going to be a baby soon..."

Oh and according to the ultrasound our baby's got one cute tushy. I'm pretty sure I'm going to hold her forever and ever and never share. You might as well not bother visiting us. Ok, I'll let you hold her while I pee.

spring baby cleaning

2011-04-18T08:34:00.000-04:00

33 weeks.

After this photo I asked the Engineer "Wow is our lense really that dirty? Look how fuzzy this photo is." Followed by "No, hun, it's our mirror." And upon closer inspection our mirror is wearing a nice fuzzy dust blanket. Can you see it?

The baby started telling me about last week that it's time to get this place spic n span. It's time to start collecting all the birth supplies the midwives keep asking about and I always think to myself we have until 37 weeks. But guess what folks? It's time to nest. In my mind, up until this point, all she really needed were some diapers, check. But now the empty corner where her bed should be is bugging me, the chemicals located under the bathroom sink and not up high (even though crawling is months away), our dirty baseboards, and dusty everything are all bugging me. I really want to higher a cleaning lady to come zoom through this place, but I cannot yet justify the cleaning lady (Definitely after LE's arrival! Very justifiable then.) I think delivering at home makes the nesting more severe. I cannot possibly relax and birth in a cluttery, dirty home. Our balacony even had to be spiffed up, with flowers and all. The Engineered didn't see the point in planting flowers as we tend to underwater them and let them be face to face with death all Summer. However, I couldn't see how I could possible birth a baby in the Shoebox without pretty flowers outside our windows.

Babygirl must enter the world into a cheery, happy Shoebox. Now off to clean and settle these urges!

From my perspective.

our cup runneth over

2011-04-11T13:39:00.000-04:00

We had a wonderful time in Ohio with family and friends this weekend. The Engineer got to go golfing with my dad, the uncles, and his twin, Marques #2. While I was showered with beautiful baby girl presents and, lets just be honest, baby bump adoration. I was seriously overwhelmed by the generousity of all our family and friends. By the end of the day I had a bad case of present face, a sore throat, and achy feet...all signs of a successful baby shower!

Even brother showed up. Wasn't that nice of him? Grammy is definitely excited for her first grandchild!

My very own diaper cake (thanks, Chris!)

The yummy actual cake, with a very fitting giraffe theme to match LE's room.

Some of that baby belly lovin I was talking about. My guests did not hold back :-)

This is why one ends up with present face....too much smiling.

A snipbit of LE's wardrobe.

Some of my favorites - homemade gifts (thanks, Debbie, Annie, and Mom)!

Thank you to all my great friends who traveled so far to be a part of my and LE's day.

One of LE's friends, cutie pie Gabriel.

My absolute favorite gift, however, came from two of my aunts. Individually they had come up to me at different times to ask how pregnancy was going. I replied "Pregnancy is great - I'm loving it!" (as you all know, my freakish ways of loving pregnancy too much). And they both informed me that it sounded like I was taking after the Enderle women and was going to have an easy delivery. All the Enderle women apparently have easy breezy uncomplicated deliveries and ultra quick deliveries after the first one (with one cousin being born at home, accidentally). This really shouldn't surprise me, as my Grandma Enderle had 15 babies herself. Clearly the DNA is set to have babies and lots of them. Thank you Aunt Patti and Marlene for your encouragement!

Thanks everyone for a great shower - especially my lovely hosts, Aunt Debbie and Letha! Now to figure out where all this stuff goes in the shoebox condo?!

hiccups and the naval

2011-04-07T17:09:00.000-04:00

Babygirl bumkins is taking after her mama, poor girl gets the hiccups all the time. At first I thought she was rhythmically kicking me (which would not be a trait she would get from me, as I was not blessed with rhythm or coordination), but then it hit me: My baby's got the hiccups.

I think I could be pregnant forever. I love having LE (Little Engineer) right here with me all the time, being all low maintenance and adorable. I've decided while it may suck when shopping for one piece swimsuits or shirts, it definitely pays to be tall and long waisted-ish when pregnant. I'm finding the third trimester to be even better than the 2nd trimester. I'm starting to become more "clearly" pregnant and I LOVE the attention. Care to comment on my bump or give it a little pat? Go ahead, I can't say I blame you. Maybe I'll want to eat my words in a month, but for now I'm wishing to be pregnant forever.

The Engineer and I have been keeping close tabs on my belly button, as it slowing inches its way to a state of "POPPED". I'm really hoping it pops by the end of the month, which just happens to be when my maternity photo shoot is. The photographer keeps using that phrase: PHOTO SHOOT. Sounds so, well not something that belongs in my life, but I'm going with it as I must document all the steps of this glorious new body and baby. In our hypnobirthing class last weekend, guess who was the only one to raise her hand to this question - "Is anyone going to video tape their birth?" If it's good enough for Kourtney Kardashian to do maternity photos and video tape her birth, then it's good enough for me. So don't be surprised if I offer a viewing of my photos or video next time you come to visit (although, I will accept a polite decline if you are now afraid to visit post baby).

32 weeks.

Little Engineer, mama would really like to have a distinct belly button for our big shoot...maybe you can start growing more towards the naval direction?

the grey zone

2011-03-28T08:45:00.001-04:00

The Engineer and I were out on our Sunday evening walk, which just happened to pass by the Salvation Army bin (for those too lazy to go to the real store...which happens to work well for all our donations). Anyway, on this day we were not there to donate, just merely walking by.

This little gem was just sitting by the bin (probably wouldn't fit in the slot). I immediately decided our Little Engineer had to have it.

Me: Look, babe! This will be perfect for her to ride around our condo!
The Engineer: We are not taking from the salvation army pile.
Me: But it's free, and it's in good condition.
The Engineer: (Gives me his 'you're ridiculous' look).
Me: This thing is probably worth $45 and every kid has one by their first birthday. (if we've learned one thing, it's that numbers speak to the Engineer)
The Engineer: Fine.
Me: Will you carry it, please?

As we continued our walk, baby car dangling from the Engineer's arm, I started to panic. "We just stole from Salvation Army." The Engineer apparently thought this was stealing all along and was wondering what was wrong with me...while I was thinking someone's junk had just become my treasure. He refused to walk back to the bin to return it and said I had to do it myself. Finally, after what seemed like a long discussion on our moral dilemma, we agreed we would return it to the Salvation Army when we're finished with it...along with all the other toys and stuff we will not need any longer.

One of my co-workers always says that she "begged, borrowed, and stole" her baby stuff. I always wondered what "stealing" looked liked? I mean she's a good person and I didn't think she meant breaking into Babies 'R' Us.

Now I understand, I too am begging, borrowing, and stealing...

(Lesson #1 for becoming a stay at home mom. Maybe coupons will be my Lesson #2 - I did see TLC is going to have a new show on coupons.)

my baby's besties

2011-03-24T17:53:00.001-04:00

Pure sweetness. Ada and Lily.

The Engineer gets to visit the nieces this Saturday and I'm quite jealous, especially since I'm stuck here working. Although I do get to have a baby shower with Church folks, so I can't complain too much. I'm so excited for the Little Engineer to meet these two, aka her best friends. I suppose I can decide who is her favorite or bestie, for a little while at least.

30 weeks.

My Little Engineer, who likes to kick and flip all night. It's ok though, I guess, since at least I know you are alive and well in there. And at least the Engineer and I know what our night times are going to look like a in a couple of months, to mentally prepare...as much as one can do that. I've been taught to be very grateful for my babycakes this week. Not every story ends happy, so I am thankful that I have a sweet baby to keep me up at night and to make my heartburn (when someone can't resist the chocolate).

I love getting to know you from the outside. Feeling your little fist bumps and stretches and what I can only imagine is your adorable bum. Aren't baby bums the cutest? I can't wait to see hers and put a little cloth diaper on it.

So much love and we've only begun.

free the belly

2011-03-23T22:39:00.000-04:00

I out grew my speedo. It just plan as day isn't going to fit anymore. This left me with three choices, buy a maternity swimsuit, buy a bigger speedo, or make do with something I already have. I picked the last option, as you can all imagine, and this left me going to the pool in a bikini. I'm normally completely against lap swimming in a non-speedo style suit, but hey I'm pregnant, right? It actually feels so much better to just let my belly be free. And for now it's the closest I'm going to get to being on a beach in a bikini insanely pregnant. Although, I'm pretty sure I made the young male lifeguard feel uncomfortable as he completely avoided any eye contact.

On another pregnancy note... Am I terribly sensitive or shall we consider it rude to comment on the growth of one's cheeks? "I can tell you've gained weight, in your face." "Your cheeks look so much fuller." "Your face is getting rounder...in a good way." Seriously...my other set of cheeks are getting a few extra lbs too, would you care to comment? Just call me fat face. Or if you want to be my favorite keep your comments localized to my uterus region. I will love you forever if you do.

these are a few of my favorite (pregnancy) things

2011-03-22T10:13:00.000-04:00

Well there are the stretch marks. I have to say praise Jesus that so far I'm stretch mark free, although, I know the scary big stretchy stages are still to come...EEEK.. I've been using this oil faithfully on both belly and boobs (yes, boobs can get stretch marks, too) since the beginning. I started with the lotion until my friend, Kristen, recommended this. It's double or triple the price, but I like it better than the lotion and it smells a little better too. I'm also the same girl who started using anti-aging eye cream at 17...you can't wait until you see the damage to start fixing it - you've got to prevent it! Public Health 101.

Red Raspberry Leaf Tea (talk to your health care provider about this one...they all have differing opinions). This tea is caffeine free and known to help tone the uterus. This uterus of mine is about to run a marathon in a couple of months, so this one makes sense to me. Susan Weed, author of Wise Woman Herbal during the Childbearing Years highly recommends Red Raspberry Tea throughout pregnancy. I just began it with the 3rd trimester.

Ouch the heartburn. I happen to hate Tums...the chalkiness makes me want to vomit. I'll chew one if I'm desperate, but definitely couldn't be my heartburn go to. I started eating papaya, which is a little expensive and hard to find one ripe enough this time of year. My midwife recommended Papaya Enzymes - a concentrated pill version of papaya. Picked these up at Whole Foods. I think they help some...nothing is magical. The thing that has helped the most is cutting out all tomato products, coffees, and trying my absolute hardest to cut out chocolate (but I fail daily...just failed 5 minutes ago and it's not even lunch time). Fresh squeezed lemon in water also seems to be taking the edge off at meal times. However, ultimately for me figuring out my trigger foods and eliminating them from diet has made the biggest difference.

Maternity jeans from Forever 21. They're the boot cut ones and like $13 and they feel like heaven. Can't beat that!

Lots of pillows. I'm now up to 5 pillows. I build a fortress around myself, isolating the poor Engineer to his quarter of the bed that is left. I also used a comforter rolled up long ways and tied to make a body pillow during the later part of my 2nd trimester.

Hypnobirthing relaxation/affirmation C.D.s. And yoga mixes. One of my yoga instructors is amazing and made me copies of all her class play lists. And for that matter yoga....AMAZING for pregnancy. I feel a big difference if I miss just one session due to this ever changing body of mine.

Ok, I better stop. My list probably could go on and on.

Happy pregnancy to all you out there!

trash can delights

2011-03-20T22:05:00.001-04:00

The Engineer and I were waiting for the elevator to head back to our shoebox condo when he spotted a box from dunkin donuts on top of the trash can. He looked in and said Hey there's donuts in here! I tried my best not to pee myself and replied No, we're not taking food from the trash. We're about to have a baby, we've got to get it together here. This has been making me giggle to myself all day. It's probably a 'you had to be there' sort of thing, but still...it's a little funny, right? What makes this funnier is that normally I'm looking for sweets like nobodies business, but since we just had cookies I wasn't desperate. Desperate Julie combined with the Engineer probably would have ended with dumpster donuts...

29 weeks.

I know what you're thinking...finally a picture taken by someone else and not another pathetic self photo in front of the same mirror!

barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen: turkey burgers

2011-03-11T11:37:00.000-05:00

Turkey Burgers

Mix ground turkey with some veggies to add a healthy twist! I added diced red pepper, onion, zucchini, and garlic. Also mixed in is steak spice. Here the cooked burger was placed on Naan (an Indian bread) and topped with mayo and lettuce.

28 weeks.

My jacket isn't quite fitting like it did last Fall...

double birthday girls

2011-03-09T21:43:00.001-05:00

I have been neglecting to share with you two very important birthdays...

Ada, the birthday girl, who is now 3, with her parents (note momma is still sporting her bump here).

Bitting at the bit to get into those presents. I do believe she's lost her toddler look and has a kid look to her now, don't you think? The theme of her presents: ART. As she would say, she likes "arting." I have to brag and say that she can color inside the lines at the age of 3!

2 days after Ada's birthday, another birthday happened...

Welcome to the world Lily Mae, the most adorable snuggle bug baby niece in the world!

once you go midwife

2011-03-02T21:22:00.001-05:00

You ain't ever going to go back. Well at least that's my experience....

The lobby isn't much to look at, completely outdated and a little tattered, but it's comfortable and complete with toys and a library (that uses the honor system for checking out books). Reception is mostly self led. You sign yourself in, like any other medical appointment, but you get to indicate which midwife you'd like to see that day. They encourage you to rotate through all of them to get to know everyone, since it could be any midwife on duty when you go into labor. The receptionist gives you your file. Next, you weigh yourself and take your own blood pressure and record it in your chart.  At this point you're free to review all the notes that have been written by the midwives, keeping you completely in the loop on your care. The midwife greets you and takes you to her office, where she remains with you throughout your entire 30-60 minute appointment (no sitting naked in a white paper gown waiting for a doctor to knock on your door).  She begins by asking you what questions you have. My experience has been this is their teaching moment, they often pull out textbooks or some sort of diagram to help you understand whatever concept is being discussed.  During the exam they explain what they are doing, if you'd like they'll give you a mirror to watch an internal exam, and for an external exam they may teach dad how to figure out where the uterus is in relation to the belly button or some little tid bit along those lines.   The best yet, 24 hour phone service. Not directly to the midwife, but one can be paged at any time if needed.

I always leave feeling empowered and more familiar with how my body and baby works.  With my midwife practice I feel like an active participant in my care, rather than violated and flustered by the generic answers to my questions that I always got with the OBs I worked with (not that you can't have great care with OBs, because I know there are some amazing ones out there!).

In addition to having a midwife at our home birth we will also be having a birth assistant. She's responsible for helping the midwife in case of an emergency, but she also doubles as a doula.  I'm a big fan of doulas. It's someone there to advocate for you and to refer to your birth plan. She also helps support dad and teaches him ways to make you more comfortable or gives him a chance to take a break. I'm looking forward to having two amazing women by my side throughout my delivery, in addition to my wonderful birth partner....aka the Engineer.

Just in case 2 amazing women by my side isn't enough, BFF Sarah is planning to come down from NYC as soon as she gets the call. She's a farm girl, so I think she'll be good to have around in this situation. My question to know if she's ready for all of this was "How do you feel about seeing me poop?" And since she didn't realize you often poop during delivery I've been giving her homework assignments...books to read, videos to watch.   And you know what? I think I've converted her, the girl has been talking about her own home birth. I'd like to convert the whole world..., but I've come to realize we each have our own path and the most important thing is that you're completely comfortable and relaxed in your path. It's been fun to watch Sarah and Marques #2 have the conversation the Engineer and I had several years ago when were just dating. Marques #2 looked slightly, ok dreadfully, terrified after watching the first video on natural births (with nothing left to the imagination). I looked over at my Engineer who has seen it so many times now he doesn't even flinch.

Lately I've been extra excited for all the stages ahead of us - me getting ginormous, the delivery, the sleepless nights immediately after with my Little Engineer. I can't wait to experience it all, but at the same time want to slowmo it all down, you know to better soak it in. Can you believe next week is 3rd trimester?

barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen: dinner and cupcakes

2011-02-22T13:23:00.000-05:00

You know the interesting thing about this new "series" (which is clearly flopping, since this is the 3rd post in the series and I'm over 1/2 way through the pregnancy) is that since becoming pregnant I don't really care to be in the kitchen. Baking used to be my favorite pastime, but then 1st trimester hit with it's nausea, followed by 2nd trimester's laziness.

They say energy hits in the 2nd trimester, and yes I do feel great, but the Engineer and I are still waiting for this so called "energy." I guess we'll just have to wait to see if the fast approaching 3rd trimester will bring any extra kitchen vibes.

Another new thing...I like meat. All types of meat (even red) on a daily basis. The Engineer is constantly trying to figure out who this new woman is. She eats meat, has curves, and is rather...well "gassy" is probably the correct word.

Pot Roast

It's just a hunk of meat that comes in a package at Trader Joes, 1 chopped onion, 1 minced garlic clove, heirloom potatoes, and a bag of baby carrots. Sear the meat on both sides for about 5 minutes with salt and pepper. Cook for 4 hours on 350 degrees.

Cookie Cupcakes

-1 box of your favorite chocolate cake mix (or your favorite from scratch recipe)
-1 package of frozen or refrigerated break off cookies
-Your favorite buttercream icing with 1/2 cup chocolate chips mixed in (I usually go with the recipe on the back of the powdered sugar box)

Fill the cupcake tins with cake mix 1/3 way full and add 1/2 a cookie to each cupcake. Bake according to cake mix instructions. Once cooled icing cupcakes and viola.

Happy Eating!

just pictures...

2011-02-20T22:32:00.000-05:00

We went to NYC this weekend and discovered this is art...

Interesting, right? Us on a morning walking tour (thank you Marques #2 for showing us around):

Baby bump photos:

24 weeks.

25 weeks.

From my perspective...

i finally met my favorite person

2011-02-17T20:32:00.001-05:00

Today something special happened. I've been waiting for this event to happen for a few weeks now, saying to the Engineer "Not one single stranger has asked me if I'm pregnant yet." Knowing full well they're just playing it smart in fear of the "she may have just gained a few"...if they even notice, that is. But tonight in my yoga class a fellow student came up to me and said "I didn't realize you were expecting!" And I really wanted to hugged her, but that probably would have been creepy, so I restrained. I don't even know her name, but she's my new favorite person. That's about all it takes to be my favorite person. Just awe over my bump and I will love you forever.

Sorry for the lack of pics, my internet is super sucky lately. Stupid fill in the blank with any internet provider (I'll keep it nice on here and not call names directly at anyone)! Maybe next week, if the techies can get it together, I'll get out a 24 week pic, just in time for week 26 pic. Ah...week 26 already?!...slow down gestation....I need more time to soak you in.

about gestating a super hero

2011-02-16T09:59:00.000-05:00

Babygirl Bumkins is moving mountains already. For about, well lets just say 20 years, Brother and I tried our best to get our parents to stop smoking. But nope, they were as stubborn as mules. Mom quit about 3 years ago, on her own accord due to a terrible case of bronchitis (Go, Mom!). However, Dad remained mule-like.

Then one day I conceived a child, to be his first grandchild, and something miraculous happened. He started to make an effort to quit. (Which even the effort, the acknowledgement that maybe smoking was bad...now that in itself was a small, but mighty miracle). Maybe Mom threatened him, in fear of smoking limiting her time with her grandchild... Or even better, as I like to think, our Little Engineer is a little super hero of some sorts

Baby Bumkins

Addiction Fighter

with her ability to make change happen through her silent, yet oh so powerful presence. He is currently working his way off electronic cigarettes with no nicotine and hasn't had a cigarette since December 2010 -HALLELUJAH.

You may be a little squeamish about our Little Engineer, Brother, but you've got to give her some respect...she made something happen in her 5 short months of existence that we had been working on for decades!

I am incredibly impressed, Dad!! Apparently Bumkins has already found a soft spot in your heart. Watch out world, I can only imagine what this little girl is going to accomplish next!

what it's like to have a preggers sil

2011-02-07T21:43:00.000-05:00

Well, it's pretty much awesome. After SIL had her first, little cutie pie Ada, we thought maybe you'll have your second when I have my first! And that's exactly what we did (of course not quite on purpose, but it's definitely special that it worked out that way). And for a little extra icing on top of the cake, we found out they're both going to be girls. Girls 3 months apart, with a big sister/cousin to be alpha dog.

One of many play dates for Lily and Little Engineer.

On a different note, the Engineer is joining me in nesting and has been knocking out his honeydo list like nobodies business. We've got new blinds, functioning toilets, modified furniture for the baby... On my end, more sewing projects, registries, and my latest idea, a couch bed. Baby minimalism has actually been fun. Coming up with new uses for old pieces of furniture and ways to fit the necessaries into a small space has been a good challenge for the nesting urge.

it's about time we kick him out, if I do say so

2011-02-03T20:41:00.001-05:00

Several weeks ago the Engineer and I were watching a ranty news show and my ears piped up when I heard this:

"The most conservative people, people who have pictures of Ronald Reagan on their wall..."

This is important, because, you see, we have this picture in our guest (soon to be baby) room.

I know it seems unreal. Like maybe I'm just making it up? But here it is. It's for real.

I wouldn't call the Engineer "the most conservative", but yet we do have Reagan hanging out on our wall, the wall that will be watching over our future offspring.

It was probably about 5 Summers ago the Engineer picked up this sketch of President Reagan for a buck and I know he would have totally forgot about it, but MIL got it framed (she likes things neat and orderly) for his college apt... And here it has followed us to our shoebox condo, creeping out our guests, and now our baby is next in line. My friend Bethnie, from Australia, asked whose grandfather it was on our wall. I say that's a sign. A sign to maybe put Ole Reagan in a box until we have a basement or something. Like a man cave, but there's clearly no room in a shoebox condo. It had a good run here. I tried to be the understanding and do the good wife "we can keep your stuff too," but let's just be honest...it's kinda creepy.

Today we say goodbye, to our beloved president and wall-friend. We'll see you again when (if ever) the man cave exists.

over halfway, already...

2011-01-30T21:50:00.000-05:00

22 weeks.

I'm loving pregnancy (post 1st trimester, that is) and wishing we could turn things to slowmo. It's going way too fast, don't you think? Which leads me to think one thing (don't freak out, Engineer), we'll have to do this again and maybe again a few more times.

sewing machine

2011-01-26T08:18:00.001-05:00

Some of you may have noticed that when I start sewing projects I get a wee bit obsessive. There's no stopping me until I'm done...it's the one time I actually ignore the Engineer. Here are my latest projects this week:

My very own hoot hider in a baby stimulating fabric (matching the first one I ever made).

Remember this fabric?

I used this blog post as my guideline for making this blanket. It provides detailed instructions that are user friendly for the sewing beginner. I did add a border fabric using what I think is the "90 degree angle corner", but I just made that part up. The inside fabric is a minky fabric, that I might add is uber soft. I also added a layer of batting for extra weight and warmth.

The Engineer apparently has a thing for minky fabric...

an overload of cute

2011-01-23T13:24:00.001-05:00

I'm excited to be able to begin making baby stuff now that we know the gender and I've totally gone into girl mode. Lucky for me, BAF Sarah made an impromptu visit this weekend and the creative juices were flowing. The following is how you dress your babygirl Bumkins stylish, comfy, and cheaply.

Whale, Cupcake, and Dino.

Tree, Beaded necklace, Bird

A closer look at the little details...

All that is required for this project: Onsies, scraps of fabric, sewing materials (hand sewing works just as well as a machine), and iron on fusible paper.

drum roll please...

2011-01-18T06:22:00.000-05:00

I told the tech to let us know when she could tell what our baby was and give us a minute to try to figure it out.

.......All I could make out was that there wasn't a penis.

........Are you sure this is the right place? I can't tell what it is...

.....After making the tech point out all her anatomy, it is official that our Little Engineer is a GIRL!!!!

She's absolutely perfect. The Engineer and I fell even more in love with her as we watched her curl up next to my placenta (she's going to be a cuddlebug), with her feet over her head (maybe a gymnast, too?), while she swallowed and licked amniotic fluid (definitely a great feeder...she's been listening to my breastfeeding pep talks).

"She already has me wrapped around her tiny intrauterine finger." -the Engineer's first response

(I'll pause now for your awwwww's.)

It's a girl. Can you believe it? I know either way would be incredibly exciting, but she's a girl and I got to see her and she's all mine.

bumkins xy?

2011-01-17T09:11:00.000-05:00

or xx?

Soon we find out which outfit our Little Engineer will wear!

via

what's a girl to do?

2011-01-14T15:21:00.001-05:00

I went to the hair cuttery today (I know who goes there, right?), on account of the Engineer coming home and me wanting to get my hair did for him. I did not request these, but this is what the hair gods decided to give me.

What do you even call them? Long, blunt bangs?

Is it still cool to do the poofy thing in the front, because I might need to do that for a few months till these bad boys grow out!

Or maybe I should just go emo? Oh dear heavens...a 27 year old preggers shouldn't go emo. It's tip toeing along side "16 and pregnant" waters.

The worst part is, my dearest Engineer hates bangs. I went through a 4 year stage where I would cut bangs every fall. Just got the itch. Confused the daylights out of the Engineer, because it always ended the same way. With regret.

It wasn't my fault this time Engineer... Maybe it won't be so bad? Kristen says your hair is suppose to grow faster during pregnancy. And my pregnant body is pretty magical after all.

In the meantime any suggestions (besides don't go to hair cutter)?

2011-01-13T20:31:00.000-05:00

Guess who gets to pick up her Engineer tomorrow?!

20 weeks.

I have no new stories, unless you want to hear how pathetic I am without my homes... BFF Sarah has already heard about it. Everyday. So, I suppose I'll spare you all the details.

looking for tigers

2011-01-11T18:53:00.000-05:00

My man's on an adventure. Safaris, tigers, elephants, camels...there's no stopping him.

On a cruise in Dubai. Next stop, his beautiful wife!

big apple

2011-01-09T15:57:00.000-05:00

My Engineer email sums it all up...

Your Julie update for the day: We had a nice walk to times square. I found 2 pairs of maternity pants, that actually fit, and a belly band thing at forever 21 (thank you high teenage pregnancy rates for providing me with cheap maternity clothes :-) Then Sar gave me like 12 shirts that work like maternity shirts/dresses (who knows why she had so many flowy clothes...) We spent part of the afternoon looking at magazines at borders, of which I looked at wedding magazines and planned sar and marques' wedding for them. It's going to be a traditional wedding at her home church, followed by a cute vintagey barn party with bbq and pie. I'm really surprised more people don't try to sweep me up as their BFF...

I desperately miss your face. Hope you are having a good sleep.

Love you, homie. xoxo

P.S. Btw, I may wear maternity pants for the rest of my life. It's like yoga pants in jean form. I'm in love.

One item I will not be taking from Sar's closet....